Monday, July 9, 2012

That fit/not fit feeling

I've been reflecting on how I don't feel fit at the moment. And how that's really fairly insane, given what my body is capable of doing. But the more I've accomplished, the higher my standards become. Sometimes, on my runs these days, I have to remind myself of all the reasons I'm not hitting my mental targets for speed and (sometimes, less frequently) distance. I'll remind myself that I continue to nurse injuries, that it's insanely hot and humid, that I did a hard work-out the day before -- whatever the "excuse" may be. Because it's not really an excuse, it's the situation. I keep trying to remind myself how excellent it is to get out and exercise no matter what. No matter that I can't hit my top pace every day, and every run. No matter that some days I'm more sluggish than others.

The important thing remains that I'm continuing to exercise -- and continuing to enjoy it.

Part of the enjoyment, of course, comes from seeing progress, so it's hard when I'm working hard and not seeing that progress. I wonder whether I've peaked as an athlete? Maybe. Maybe it doesn't matter.

I'm enjoying the new challenge that soccer provides. I finally let my husband (who is a talented soccer player and coach) come out and watch a game yesterday. I really wanted him to, actually. I sense that I have some raw talent, but there are holes in my skills and tactical understanding of the game that I just knew he could help me with. (If I could accept the advice!) It's hard to accept advice -- or hard not to hear only the criticism, so it helped to hear everything I was already doing right mixed into the advice too. I'm speedy, I challenge for the ball and win it often, I'm aggressive, and I work hard. But I'm not running the angles, and I need to practice certain skills -- directing the ball with my body when receiving it; turning with the ball; and running with the ball. I also need to shoot more frequently when coming in on the net -- my tendency is to pass it instead, because I don't want to be seen as a ball hog. Duh. They have me up front as a striker because they want me to shoot the ball and score! I needed that reminder yesterday.

I'm also interested in the tactical elements of the game, and hope to work with teammates on a few ideas. For example, my husband tells me that forwards shouldn't be tied to one side of the field, but should be constantly looking for ways to make space for each other, even if that means running to the opposite side of the field, either to follow the play, or to make space. It confuses the defenders. It opens up the game.

So what I'm learning, about seven games in, is getting more sophisticated.

I'm trying to maintain my weekend long run, but it's a challenge with the soccer game falling on Sunday afternoons. So I've been trying to run on Saturdays. This Saturday I worked up to 18.5km, but it was a very humid and hot afternoon, and even though I went out with lots of hydration on board, I kept experiencing worrisome symptoms throughout the run -- chills, mostly. My pace was dreadful. I was never better than 5:30/km, and was often as slow as 5:45, even 5:50 for my last 3km split. I've rarely felt so drained at the end of a run, just trying to keep my feet turning over. It was disappointing to say the least. I also felt my hip the next day, which reminds me that I haven't done physio exercises for ages.

Add that to the mix, daily is my plan. I did both yoga stretches and physio exercises yesterday. Stretching post-soccer is key to my injury-free soccer plan. My IT band was bothering me two weeks ago. All it took was some yoga (at home) and everything kind of snapped back into place. But my quad muscle is still bothering me, and slowing me on the runs.

I'm also excited to add swimming back into the mix on a more regular basis for the next three weeks. I'll get to swim four times this week, accompanying my daughter to her hour-long swim lessons. Today I changed after we got there, and it was feedback day (argh!) so my swim was cut a bit short, but I put in 1800m. I LOVE swimming outdoors in the 50m pool. Nothing compares. LOVE IT. I'll get four swims this week, and then half hour swims for the following two weeks while the little kids are in their swim lessons. I just know it's going to bump up my fitness level. And it's easy on the legs. Would love to swim daily all summer long. Was fantasizing about going with husband over lunch hour, wondering how much time that would take out of our work days and whether we could fit it in this summer.

I'm training toward the 25 km Toad, and also hoping to run the Hamilton marathon this fall. But I don't feel as strong as I did last summer -- I haven't had the same race schedule, and I haven't done a single outdoor bike ride yet this summer. I think the cross-training last year contributed to my speed and endurance, and really, I've mainly been running. It's easy, and I can fit it in around my kids' crazy soccer schedules. I've been too tired to do many early mornings.

Anyway, back to the fit/not fit question. I was thinking about how insane it is to think of myself as "not that fit." Which is what I'll admit I'm feeling as I hack along at 5:45/km. But I'm 37 years old, and I'm able to run 18.5km on Saturday, play 90 minutes of hard-running soccer 24 hours later, and then swim 1800m less than 24 hours after that. I think most people would consider that relatively fit, right??

So I'm going to try to, too. Rather than measuring it all in speeds and splits, I'm going to be happy with continuing to be able to exercise regularly, at whatever level my body is able to manage.

Monday, June 4, 2012

Learning how to kick

This past week was very much up and down for me, emotionally. By Friday, I felt spent and I did absolutely no exercise on Friday or on Saturday, not even my physio stuff. I was disappointed in myself, but I was also just too tired to move.

I was so glad for the swim on Monday morning. It loosened up my aching leg muscles after the soccer game on Sunday. Turns out I've been kicking the ball wrong. I knew it! I knew it was something in the mechanics. It took a soccer practice yesterday afternoon, and then an impromptu back yard practice with my husband last night after the kids were in bed to crack the code. Honestly, I was swinging so hard and the ball was going nowhere and it was hurting like crazy. Was it where I was planting my foot? Was it the angle of my upper body? Was it where my foot was striking the ball?

The odd thing was that my pass was very accurate and stronger than my kick. Turns out I was passing with my leg at the correct angle, but I was kicking the ball dead on. What helped was not my husband watching what I was doing, but me watching my husband kick the ball properly. I finally said, I can't kick it the way you kick it because you're coming at it from an angle and I just can't do that. Visually, I couldn't understand how to approach the ball except to come at it dead on. That's what made sense to my head. As soon as we realized that was what I was doing, everything changed. I watched my husband kick the ball, and saw how he planted his foot, and his hip acted as a hinge to bring his other leg back on an angle so that he could swing through the ball with full force.

When I was kicking it dead on, I had no force at all, because the hip doesn't hinge that way. There is no way to pull the leg back to give a good swing, so all the power was coming from my much-weakened and inflamed little thigh muscle. Ouch!

As soon as it made sense to my brain, my body was able to do it. It was like a switch flipping. Suddenly, I could strike the ball with force every time. Zero pain. It didn't even feel hard. I'm relieved. I hope this make me an asset to my team, so I can combine my speed with some actual useful soccer skills. Speed only gets me so far.

The week did have a good soccer flavour, though we didn't play a game yesterday (practice instead). On Tuesday evening, I practiced soccer with my daughter for a good forty-five minutes. We had to be at the field very very early due to only having one car and also having three kids playing soccer. As other girls trickled in, they joined our impromptu practice, and it was so fun. We kept adding defenders and forwards and basically doing one drill over and over -- passing the ball around before trying to score (my daughter was practicing her goalkeeping skills). When the real practice started, I headed out for a 5.5km run in the woods.

Got up early the next morning for a run with my friend: 8.8km.

And then "spittlebell" class on Thursday morning. More spinning than weights, which was a bit disappointing. I love the weights. I meant to run that evening, but instead I stayed home with our youngest and did dishes, laundry, and read books with him. One daughter was on a sleepover so she wasn't at her soccer game, which freed me up. It will probably be the only occasion this summer that it happens, so I took advantage of it, and took a break.

But the break stretched out. Friday I didn't get up early to do anything. And it rained and got cold by Saturday. Plus my husband was working. I just had no motivation.

Thankfully, I woke up Sunday morning, early and refreshed, and went for a long run. To get myself out the door, I decided just to run 10km. But as I was running and feeling good, I decided to run my 12km route instead. And then I was feeling so fit that I added some extra loops in at the park on the way home, and went 14.7km. Should have gone around the block just to add in that extra 300m so I could say it was an even 15km.

I had a bit of a break, and then soccer practice. I felt good, and feel fine today too. I did not run fast, and in fact it was a really slow pace. I never got going much faster than 5:30/km. But I think that's okay. The long runs are supposed to be slow. I can't run everything like I'm in a race -- though that is my instinct. While out running, I decided to get back on the bike again too. I also decided to organize a summer running club for my kids and their friends this summer. And I wondered -- why is it so hard, some days, to move at all? To take that first step? To force myself to go?

I never regret it. I always enjoy it.

So with that in mind, I started this week with another swim. I'm still not back on form, though I suspect it might be this wounded wrong-kick leg muscle which is troubling me and slowing me down. But I hung in for the hour, and swam 2600m in 59 minutes.

Planning a soccer practice with the kids tonight -- hoping, really hoping, it doesn't rain. We have to all go to one child's soccer practice, as my husband plays soccer at the same time. Last time, though, it was very fun, and we mostly played soccer too, passing the ball around. I'd like to practice that kick and really sink it into my muscle memory.

Monday, May 28, 2012

Soccer

I've added soccer to my life. And I'm not sure it will fit very well with distance training. I'll admit that my main concern is injury. Soccer involves a lot of quick sprints, sudden stops, exciting turns, and sometimes being crashed to the ground by an opposing player. I came home with blood on my knee yesterday.

I haven't played since the age of ten, one season in a girls' house league. I was fast back then, and my coach suggested I try out for the select team, but my brother was sick at the time, and my parents never followed up. In the years since, I regretted that. In fact, I never played organized team sports again after that season.

I wasn't sure I'd like playing a team sport, but so far it's been really fun. My first game, I was very tentative, and we were totally out-matched by a much more skilled team. But yesterday's game was played against a team of similar skills (and ages), and suddenly -- I was super-fast. I could run past all of the defenders and in for the net. But I couldn't get the damn ball to go in. I made a couple of decent crosses in front of the net, but my inexperience showed. I was placing the ball to close to the goalie.

I did less well the second half. In part because my right thigh was aching. At least this is a new injury! My hip seems quite all right. But the quick sprints use different muscle groups, as does the kicking and passing, and my right leg is getting more of a work out than my left. I'm stiff as a board today.

I got up early this morning for a swim. I was slow in the pool, and my thigh still hurt a bit, but it felt good to be in water, and to stretch out. I went 2600m, slowly. I really enjoyed swimming again, and it felt like good exercise, good for the lungs. I wasn't too tired afterward either, and felt that I could have gone further. But not faster, unfortunately.

I did not do a long run this weekend. Frankly, I was just too tired. I also wasn't sure I'd put on enough miles over the course of the week. Next weeked is a break from soccer, so I'm hoping to run about 15km. I ran 14.5km last weekend, and then played my first soccer game the next day. Bad idea. Might have had something to do with the original leg strain.

I'm finding the distance running challenging. I did keep a good pace throughout the 14.5km run, though, clocking in at about 5:20/km. My aim was 5:30. Even when my legs felt jellyish, my feet kept up the pace.

My hope with the soccer is that I will get comfortable with the sprints, and this will add an element to my training that I'm not currently doing -- interval training. It could be an opportunity to get faster.

Or it could be an opportunity to get hurt. Yes, I feel my age these days. Sigh.

One final note: I'm not doing yoga right now!!! I really miss it, but there is no time to squeeze it in, unless I get up early one extra morning a week, which hasn't been feasible recently. With everyone in soccer, we're often not home and putting kids to be bed until after 9, at which point we still have supper cleanup, dishes, and laundry. I'm falling into bed around 10:30, utterly wiped, with no real downtime. It's felt relentless, honestly. It's a tough pace. Some mornings, therefore, I choose sleep.

Sunday, May 13, 2012

Mother's day run

I went for my first "distance" run this afternoon. It was a mere 12km, but that's far and away the furthest than I've run since my injury in January. And I did it in good time, too, and pain-free. So yay!

I would like to do a long run every weekend (working up gradually to about 28km, and then maintaining the weekend long run between 18-25km, never less than 15km). I'd only been planning to run 10km, but as soon as I got out on my old familiar 12km route, I just couldn't turn back. Turns out the route is actually 12.3km. I started slowly, and gradually kicked my pace up until I was running consistently at 5/km, sometimes faster, sometimes a few seconds slower. I ended 12km in 1:01, which made me pretty darn happy. I'm back, baby!

That's still off my best one-hour runs from last season, which were pushing 13km/hr, but nevertheless satisfying.

I was thinking that endurance training is really about teaching yourself how to breathe heavily for a long period of time. Next time I'm bringing water, however. I was definitely flirting with dehydration, given the heat. Had I known I was going 12km ...

Can't wait to keep on running. It just makes me so happy.

:::

Side note: I've signed up to play on a women's rec soccer team. The last time I was on a team was, oh, twenty-seven years ago. I kid you not. I've asked to play forward or midfield and they are thrilled, apparently being overloaded with defenders (my husband tells me that older teams are often overloaded with defenders, as the running gets harder). My skills are rusty, but I'm looking forward to the stop and go running -- should get some good sprint work in. Maybe it will make me faster!

Thursday, April 19, 2012

Run, run, as fast as you can

Okay, now I know I'll never be the fastest runner around. So my pleasure derives purely from pushing my limits and seeing how fast and far I can go. It's personal. And weirdly happy-making.

On Tuesday, we had what could have been our last spin class, except it looks like it will be extended another four weeks. I'm happy to stay inside. I want it not to be cold before I get outside riding in the early morning. (I know, Nath, I just need to dress better! But I'm a cold-wimp on my bike. Or maybe just a wimp.) Anyway, started Tuesday with spin class.

In the afternoon, I led a little running club of neighbourhood kids (including two of my own) on a 3km training session. The pace was not blistering, but the kids were thrilled to have made it 3km. It took us 20:52 (or thereabouts). I was wearing my GPS watch which greatly added to everyone's pleasure. "How far now?" We also stopped and walked for one minute between kilometres. I must say, the pace was so easy it wasn't really like runinng, for me. But it was super-fun.

And then, about an hour later, I took my daughter to soccer practice. And I got to run again. Again, my GPS watch greatly added to the pleasure. I'm getting rather addicted to it. I decided to run 5km as quickly as I could manage. There was a stiff wind and the loop was hilly, but hey. That meant sometimes the wind was at my back, sometimes in my face; couldn't complain. For the first kilometre, I didn't push too hard. But as I went on, I started to see my /km time on the watch drop, until I was running fairly consistently at 13km/hr. I got it as high as 14 with the downhill, and tried to keep it better than 12 even on the uphills. My goal was to finish 5km in less than 24 minutes. And I did it! The last km was brutal, but I kept my feet turning over as quickly as I could. I even passed two cyclists (admittedly, they weren't going very fast, but they looked pretty surprised). My time was 23:54. And then I ran two more kilometres, just to make it an even 10 on the day, and finished 7km in 34:35. So the pace definitely slowed, but it also felt easy. I used the last 2km as a cool-down.

What I loved about the run was imagining training myself to run comfortably at the 4:40 pace. That would make 5:00 pace feel easy. And then I could conquer the marathon in 3:30! Of course, I was pushing to my limit to keep it going at that pace, but, still. My limit used to be 5/km. It's all in the training. Training myself to accept new normals. And I'll need to add endurance training in too.

The next morning, early, I ran another 7.7km, for a total of nearly 18km in just over twelve hours. See? Happy-making!

But I've neglected my strength exercises. Must add these back in. Start watching TV again? I need to do pair them with something because I find them so boring, it's next to impossible to motivate myself now that my hip feels fine. But I could easily slip backwards, and I know it, if I get neglectful.

Saturday, April 14, 2012

More running

How much have I run this week? I know it's more than I've run since January, and I'm happy about that. None of my runs have been longer than 9km, but that's okay. I'm working my way up slowly to the longer runs. I keep doing the shorter runs at a fast pace -- as fast as I can push it -- and I'm not sure I even remember how to do a long run anymore. I will have to moderate my efforts slightly when I add those back in. Waiting to get an okay from the dr before attempting any.

Meanwhile ...

From Sunday to Saturday: 4.5 + 6 + 9 + 6 + 8 = 33.5km
That's not quite at the 40km/week I was aiming for back at the beginning of the year, but it's getting closer. A few of those runs were done very much against what I was feeling like doing, but I just decided to take opportunities and go. In addition to the running, I also went to one spin class, one spin + kettlebell class, and one kundalini class. So mostly running, really. Running is my favourite thing to do, even though it's really hard. Today, I ran trails during my daughter's soccer practice. I tried to keep my pace at 12km/hour. Uphill my pace would fall off. Downhill it would amp up. I'm still lacking in endurance, but I managed to keep my pace consistent for 8km, which I completed in 40.42 minutes. That's off my hoped-for 10-km race pace by a bit ... but on the other hand, it wasn't a race, and it involved some very big hills. I find myself trying to run virtually every time as if I were in a race. I'm not sure how to turn off that part of myself. I actually enjoyed my Thursday evening run, in a slightly twisted way, because I wasn't in the mood to run so I just set the goal very low: just get out and run, for as long as I could stand it. I felt physically kind of miserable. My GPS watch was not working. So I just ran, without glancing to see my pace. I think that was good for me, mentally. Probably worked less hard, but also kind of enjoyed the laid-back-ness of it, and appreciated myself just for trying.

I've been really tired, however. Never fully felt awake this week. I hope it's a temporary energy lull.

Tuesday, April 10, 2012

Up, Down, Up, Down

Okay, to begin, Friday to Tuesday record of exercise (since I missed posting earlier):

Friday: physio, strength exercises, 6.5km run
Saturday: strength exercises
Sunday: strength exercises, 7km run
Monday: swim 2800m
Tuesday: spin 1 hr, run 7km
Wednesday: run 7.5km, physio and strength exercises
Thursday: spin and kettlebell class, strength exercises
Friday: run 7.5km (34 minutes)
Saturday: played soccer with my kids
Sunday: 25 minute trail running within a 90 minute hike, strength exercises
Monday: NOTHING
Tuesday: spin 1 hr

:::

So here's the physio scoop. When I saw her last week on Wednesday, she gave me a small set of strengthening exercises to continue working on, almost all core exercises with one glute exercise too. And she said she wouldn't need to see me for a few weeks, so I arranged to see her before seeing the sports doctor, which is at the end of this month. She will do a running assessment at that time. When I asked about long, slow runs, she said they would be at a lower cadence. But down the road, as my fitness improves again, I might be running my long slow runs at a pretty fast cadence. It's all relative.

I had an awesome run on Friday afternoon. I kept getting faster with each passing kilometre, and my GPS watch was working. At each kilometre, the watch shows me how fast my pace was for the last kilometre. I did one kilometre lap in 4:38, which is fast for me. I felt no pain, just felt like it was really hard work. Really really hard to keep my feet moving at that quick cadence.

I don't feel in terrific shape. This morning's spin class felt tough, much tougher than it seemed it ought to. I think, however, that I was feeling the after-effects of the trail running I did on the weekend. I rolled my ankle several times on that run, and after the last time it really hurt. I probably should have iced it. It was very stiff yesterday, and is still fairly painful today. I was feeling it during spin, not agonizing pain or anything, just discomfort. But I was also feeling my calves on both legs. I must have been using them on the hike, perhaps more than I should have--seems like my glutes should have been working harder than my calves.

It's a new week, but I've got a kid home sick, and it doesn't feel like a new week yet. And I don't have that it's a new week energy either. Sometimes it's all about hanging in and getting through, and sticking with the plan. Haven't decided whether or not I should run this evening. But I definitely need to do my strength exercises. Definitely. I felt a bit lost without a weekly visit scheduled with my physio--I think that was keeping me honest re the exercises. Now I have to keep myself honest.

Have not been to yoga in way too long. Missed this Monday for an Easter dinner, and last Monday because we had a complicated food pickup. My body is missing that stretching, that's for sure.