Okay, I clearly rarely publish on this side blog, seeing as I last posted back in October. I have not been working toward any race goals since completing the Run for the Toad late in September. I've been lucky to get three runs every week, although I also play soccer once a week, spin once a week, and do a spin and weights class once a week, which adds up to a fair amount of regular exercise, although doesn't exactly point me in a specific goal-related direction.
That's been okay. I just set my routine and show up, basically, and it's certainly enough exercise to keep me fit and happy.
This holiday has given me fewer opportunities to get out and exercise. The classes shut down, and friends are away or busy, so last week I managed to run twice, and play soccer once. I felt incredibly sluggish on this morning's run ... and it had been three days since I'd last done anything. It reminded me of the importance of simply showing up.
It's really easy not to do things. It's so easy! And this is a holiday, and there's a sense, on holidays, of relaxing one's standards, resting, indulging, taking it easy. I'm not so sure that taking it easy sits well with me. I'm not so sure that I don't, in fact, find it more stressful to take it easy than the alternative of a regular, quite strict routine.
Have I lost the ability to have fun?
Or maybe my definition has changed.
I worry that I'm in danger of becoming a joyless puritan. And yet, I don't really enjoy the effects of a night spent drinking. I much prefer the effects of an early morning run. Those two things don't go together at all. (At least, I can't seem to put the two together!)
Anyway, rambling post here. I need my triathlon blog for the rambling posts. I enjoyed this morning's run. I kept it short -- only 7km -- and slow -- I'd forgotten how much the cold and the snow turns my pace to molasses. And yet I got out. I decided last night that I would run this morning, and I got up and ran. It's that simple, that basic. While running I thought about all kinds of subjects. I plotted future running goals: maintaining a Monday morning run (which I did sporadically this fall), and adding in a long run on Saturday afternoons (I haven't done long runs since Thanksgiving weekend, when I decided not to train for the Hamilton marathon). I thought about signing up for the Race Around the Bay at the end of March -- 30km, a nice long distance, but not quite as gruelling as a marathon. I plotted out my training plan: increasing not just distance, but time, each week between now and March. I thought about how it would be lovely to have a goal to work toward that is dependent only on my own fitness and determination (and health, of course!) ... because it could be that this proves to be a tough year, and I may face rejection and failure, there is no telling, as I apply for a couple of different exciting new directions, including midwifery school, The Amazing Race, and various writing grants.
Will I succeed, and be accepted into any of the above? I can only do my best, and hope. But acceptance is reliant on a variety of factors not under my control. Training for a race would put (almost) all of the factors under my control and give me something concrete to work toward, assuming my body could hold up to the increased training. I think I will plan for that, and sign up for the race.
Much feels up in the air about this coming year -- but that's how it always is, isn't it! As my husband says, Things aren't going to work out as you've planned ...
But so often I'm grateful that things haven't worked out as I've planned, because there is so much I can't imagine or foresee, and life is much richer than my own imagination can invent. All of that said, I remain a believer in doing. In not being passive. In setting goals, going deep, doing the work, taking risks, pushing myself on all fronts -- emotionally, physically, spiritually, professionally, personally, communally.
Monday, December 31, 2012
Wednesday, October 17, 2012
A small thrill
I've been on a high since my run yesterday evening. I wasn't sure how far I'd go, but figured on somewhere between 8 and 10km. My daughter has swim training a few evenings a week now, and it's out near some of my favourite trails, which makes running a pleasure. I set off feeling very light of heart and fleet of feet, for reasons unknown. At the 1km mark, I noticed that I'd run just under 5 minutes/km, which is fast for my opening kilometre -- I tend to start slow and speed up as I warm up.
I passed a group of university students training for cross country. I didn't want any of them to catch up to me, so I really hoofed it through the woods. Next thing I knew, I'd run the second kilometre in 4:33. This is unheard of for me. I never break the 4:40 mark. The third kilometre was a touch slower, in the 4:40s, but the fourth kilometre was back to 4:37, and I thought, oh my goodness, I'm on track for my fastest 5km run ever. I absolutely hoofed it for the next kilometre: 4:22. I've never seen that time before. I didn't even know that I could run that fast, honestly. Overall, I'd done 5km in 23:18, my fastest ever recorded.
But I was out in the woods, still far from the end point. I took a minute to walk and get my heart rate calmed down. I began jogging again, figuring hey, I'll just run this out, however long it takes me to get back, no need to speed. But then I saw that kilometre six was at 5:36, which is really not that slow, considering I'd walked for a full minute. I realized that my "slow" pace was actually pretty fast, it just felt slow compared to the blistering 4:20 time. So I thought, hey, let's go for a fast 10km and see what happens.
I must add that I was pushing extremely hard throughout this run. I was breathing rapidly, and it was not easy.
I kept the next three kilometres well under 5 minutes, but I was really going to have to push it to get in under 48 minutes, which was my goal -- as that's my fastest 10km time ever (and that was recorded in a race). There was a huge hill at the start of the last kilometre, but I was running past the university kids, whose workout was apparently already over. I pushed it up the hill and just kept pushing it. In fact, I was downright sprinting at the end, and I made it!!! 10km in 47:56. I realize that's not blistering for real runners, but it's blistering for me.
I came home completely thrilled.
And got up this morning and ran another 9km with my friend -- we go so slowly that we covered that 9km in 55 minutes. But we talk. There would be no talking at the other pace.
I don't know why I love finding speed. I don't know why I get such a rush from pushing myself in ways that can only be described objectively as "hard" or "unpleasant" or "painful." I'm getting the sense that running faster is not just about getting fitter physically, but about being willing to push one's body well beyond comfort levels, to keep pushing even though everything is saying "stop!" It's a mental strength as much as a physical one. I love the days when I'm mentally strong enough to push myself like that.
And I'm not doing the marathon, or the half. I have a big reading the day before, and those drain me, mentally. And I haven't put on the necessary mileage. But I'm going to keep enjoying these speed runs nevertheless, and hope to sign up for some longer races this winter.
Running. It really feeds something in me.
I passed a group of university students training for cross country. I didn't want any of them to catch up to me, so I really hoofed it through the woods. Next thing I knew, I'd run the second kilometre in 4:33. This is unheard of for me. I never break the 4:40 mark. The third kilometre was a touch slower, in the 4:40s, but the fourth kilometre was back to 4:37, and I thought, oh my goodness, I'm on track for my fastest 5km run ever. I absolutely hoofed it for the next kilometre: 4:22. I've never seen that time before. I didn't even know that I could run that fast, honestly. Overall, I'd done 5km in 23:18, my fastest ever recorded.
But I was out in the woods, still far from the end point. I took a minute to walk and get my heart rate calmed down. I began jogging again, figuring hey, I'll just run this out, however long it takes me to get back, no need to speed. But then I saw that kilometre six was at 5:36, which is really not that slow, considering I'd walked for a full minute. I realized that my "slow" pace was actually pretty fast, it just felt slow compared to the blistering 4:20 time. So I thought, hey, let's go for a fast 10km and see what happens.
I must add that I was pushing extremely hard throughout this run. I was breathing rapidly, and it was not easy.
I kept the next three kilometres well under 5 minutes, but I was really going to have to push it to get in under 48 minutes, which was my goal -- as that's my fastest 10km time ever (and that was recorded in a race). There was a huge hill at the start of the last kilometre, but I was running past the university kids, whose workout was apparently already over. I pushed it up the hill and just kept pushing it. In fact, I was downright sprinting at the end, and I made it!!! 10km in 47:56. I realize that's not blistering for real runners, but it's blistering for me.
I came home completely thrilled.
And got up this morning and ran another 9km with my friend -- we go so slowly that we covered that 9km in 55 minutes. But we talk. There would be no talking at the other pace.
I don't know why I love finding speed. I don't know why I get such a rush from pushing myself in ways that can only be described objectively as "hard" or "unpleasant" or "painful." I'm getting the sense that running faster is not just about getting fitter physically, but about being willing to push one's body well beyond comfort levels, to keep pushing even though everything is saying "stop!" It's a mental strength as much as a physical one. I love the days when I'm mentally strong enough to push myself like that.
And I'm not doing the marathon, or the half. I have a big reading the day before, and those drain me, mentally. And I haven't put on the necessary mileage. But I'm going to keep enjoying these speed runs nevertheless, and hope to sign up for some longer races this winter.
Running. It really feeds something in me.
Sunday, October 7, 2012
Run for the Toad, thoughts on the race one week later
Well, I finished 188th out of 750 finishers (men and women), and 54th out of 421 women finishers. My time was two minutes slower than last year, a very respectable 2:20:54. The numbers would suggest that I did very well, all things considered. So why, I asked my husband, did I feel after the race like I'd had a less-than-stellar run? Why was I disappointed in my efforts?
I think, sometimes, that my expectations will always be too high, and it's just part of my personality. It's inborn. Luckily, these high expectations never seem to prevent me from trying, even when I know I'm likely to fail. But I also can feel very disparaging of my own efforts when I fall short of these expectations. What I don't understand is why the disparagement isn't discouraging. Because it really isn't. Maybe it's even motivating in some strange way.
Maybe that's how my psyche works: expect great things, work hard, fail to meet expectations, work harder.
I ran a fair bit this week. I did a very fast 5km run on an indoor track after buying new shoes. (One of the unfortunate things about the Toad was that my shoes started blistering my feet about halfway through; the last half of the race I could just feel those blisters getting bigger and bigger -- and they really hurt, which didn't help my morale.) Anyway, on Tuesday I tested the new shoes on the track, to make sure they fit well, in case I wanted to return them. I was on a high after getting terrific news that day (that my book was a finalist for a major Canadian literary award), and I kept up a blistering pace, despite the hockey kids playing on the track.
I also ran Wednesday morning with a friend (9km).
The "spittlebell" class on Thursday morning felt easy ... my usual weight felt light, but I didn't want to tell the instructor lest he hand me something heavier. Maybe it was just lightness of heart.
Today, Sunday, I went for a long run, still in hopes of being fit enough to run the Hamilton marathon in a few weeks, although I'll admit my hopes are diminishing. I want to run fast, and I can tell that the pace I'd like to hold is currently out of reach. I don't think the distance, persay, is out of reach, but I'd have to hold to a slower pace, and I kind of don't want to. I'm considering signing up for the half-marathon instead, and trying to tear through that distance. (But I'd still like to do the marathon, honestly. Wish I had an extra month to train.)
I ran 18km, keeping pretty close to a 5:15/km pace, sometimes a bit less, and on one or two kilometres toward the end, a bit more. I ran 18km in 1:33. (Just checked, and that's a 5:16 pace.) I don't think I could sustain that over another 20-odd kilometres, frankly -- at least I couldn't have today -- and I'd have to average even slightly faster to break last year's time. Why do I want to break last year's time so badly?? Well. I'm not sure. I think it relates back to that expectations thing.
I won't sign up for the marathon unless I can get in a good long long run, something over 30km. For tapering purposes, I'd need to get that in next weekend. It's not impossible, but it seems unlikely. My husband is working all day Saturday, and my eldest daughter has a swim meet to which I have to travel, taking the other three kids along. AND I think I may even have a soccer game that Sunday. Good grief. I'm in Vancouver the following weekend.
Hm.
But I did a good job at the Toad! A week past the event's running, I can now feel genuinely proud at my effort and my results. It wasn't such a bad race after all.
I'm thinking of signing up yearly, as a seasonal almost ritual event, no matter what's happening in my life. I really like that race.
I think, sometimes, that my expectations will always be too high, and it's just part of my personality. It's inborn. Luckily, these high expectations never seem to prevent me from trying, even when I know I'm likely to fail. But I also can feel very disparaging of my own efforts when I fall short of these expectations. What I don't understand is why the disparagement isn't discouraging. Because it really isn't. Maybe it's even motivating in some strange way.
Maybe that's how my psyche works: expect great things, work hard, fail to meet expectations, work harder.
I ran a fair bit this week. I did a very fast 5km run on an indoor track after buying new shoes. (One of the unfortunate things about the Toad was that my shoes started blistering my feet about halfway through; the last half of the race I could just feel those blisters getting bigger and bigger -- and they really hurt, which didn't help my morale.) Anyway, on Tuesday I tested the new shoes on the track, to make sure they fit well, in case I wanted to return them. I was on a high after getting terrific news that day (that my book was a finalist for a major Canadian literary award), and I kept up a blistering pace, despite the hockey kids playing on the track.
I also ran Wednesday morning with a friend (9km).
The "spittlebell" class on Thursday morning felt easy ... my usual weight felt light, but I didn't want to tell the instructor lest he hand me something heavier. Maybe it was just lightness of heart.
Today, Sunday, I went for a long run, still in hopes of being fit enough to run the Hamilton marathon in a few weeks, although I'll admit my hopes are diminishing. I want to run fast, and I can tell that the pace I'd like to hold is currently out of reach. I don't think the distance, persay, is out of reach, but I'd have to hold to a slower pace, and I kind of don't want to. I'm considering signing up for the half-marathon instead, and trying to tear through that distance. (But I'd still like to do the marathon, honestly. Wish I had an extra month to train.)
I ran 18km, keeping pretty close to a 5:15/km pace, sometimes a bit less, and on one or two kilometres toward the end, a bit more. I ran 18km in 1:33. (Just checked, and that's a 5:16 pace.) I don't think I could sustain that over another 20-odd kilometres, frankly -- at least I couldn't have today -- and I'd have to average even slightly faster to break last year's time. Why do I want to break last year's time so badly?? Well. I'm not sure. I think it relates back to that expectations thing.
I won't sign up for the marathon unless I can get in a good long long run, something over 30km. For tapering purposes, I'd need to get that in next weekend. It's not impossible, but it seems unlikely. My husband is working all day Saturday, and my eldest daughter has a swim meet to which I have to travel, taking the other three kids along. AND I think I may even have a soccer game that Sunday. Good grief. I'm in Vancouver the following weekend.
Hm.
But I did a good job at the Toad! A week past the event's running, I can now feel genuinely proud at my effort and my results. It wasn't such a bad race after all.
I'm thinking of signing up yearly, as a seasonal almost ritual event, no matter what's happening in my life. I really like that race.
Monday, September 24, 2012
Training for the Toad
So I've kept up my training plan for the Toad. I ran 15km last weekend, and then ran 12.5km on Saturday, and 10km on Sunday, all at race pace. Actually, probably faster than race pace, because honestly I'm not sure I could hold that pace for 25km on trails, and that's not really my plan.
But here's an awesome thing: I can now hold the 5:00/km for 12km. I used to struggle to hold it for 5km. In fact, that seems to be the pace my feet now want to run, and when I'm feeling even peppier, I'll pick it up for about 4:40/km. I was able to run 12km in 59:56 on Saturday, which pleased me to no end. It was a hilly course and I fought a huge headwind for the last half of the run, but I kept my pace consistent throughout -- really pleased with that run. The only thing I can add is that it's hard work to run that hard for an hour. That's all.
But I think it's good for me. It reminds me/teaches me that I can do things that are hard, that I can keep going.
I'm running with a shorter more upright stride, like my physio showed me, and it's true, I can really go faster running that way. But it's also harder, uses different muscles: stomach, glutes, inner thighs. That's the core right there.
If I'm to be honest, I'll admit I've been having some twinges of pain in my hip these last few runs. So I've added my physio exercises back in. I hope it won't get worse. I love running long distances but maybe my body doesn't? I hope these exercises keep the pain to twinge level. At least I know, having had all those tests done last winter, that it's not a stress fracture or anything too serious.
Managed my second run of the weekend in 50:21 for 10km. Not bad. Consistent, again. In fact, for three straight kilometres, I ran exactly 5:00/km. Taking just 20 seconds off of each kilometre takes a huge effort. My new goal (assuming the hip holds) is to make 4:40 my standard pace, and 4:30 my speedier pace. I could start by just holding 4:40 over 5km, and then work my way up -- after all, it's worked for the 5:00 pace.
Why do I like going fast? I wonder, but I'll never know.
But here's an awesome thing: I can now hold the 5:00/km for 12km. I used to struggle to hold it for 5km. In fact, that seems to be the pace my feet now want to run, and when I'm feeling even peppier, I'll pick it up for about 4:40/km. I was able to run 12km in 59:56 on Saturday, which pleased me to no end. It was a hilly course and I fought a huge headwind for the last half of the run, but I kept my pace consistent throughout -- really pleased with that run. The only thing I can add is that it's hard work to run that hard for an hour. That's all.
But I think it's good for me. It reminds me/teaches me that I can do things that are hard, that I can keep going.
I'm running with a shorter more upright stride, like my physio showed me, and it's true, I can really go faster running that way. But it's also harder, uses different muscles: stomach, glutes, inner thighs. That's the core right there.
If I'm to be honest, I'll admit I've been having some twinges of pain in my hip these last few runs. So I've added my physio exercises back in. I hope it won't get worse. I love running long distances but maybe my body doesn't? I hope these exercises keep the pain to twinge level. At least I know, having had all those tests done last winter, that it's not a stress fracture or anything too serious.
Managed my second run of the weekend in 50:21 for 10km. Not bad. Consistent, again. In fact, for three straight kilometres, I ran exactly 5:00/km. Taking just 20 seconds off of each kilometre takes a huge effort. My new goal (assuming the hip holds) is to make 4:40 my standard pace, and 4:30 my speedier pace. I could start by just holding 4:40 over 5km, and then work my way up -- after all, it's worked for the 5:00 pace.
Why do I like going fast? I wonder, but I'll never know.
Sunday, September 9, 2012
A good note
I'm ending this week on a good note: a great long run!
I wanted to run 2 hours to try to see if I felt prepared for the Toad, which is in just under four weeks from now. As I got going and settled in to the run, I continued to feel really good, and I decided to aim for a half-marathon distance at minimum. The kilometres really started ticking away by the time I'd gotten into the teens. I'd set my watch to give me my split for every kilometre, and I couldn't believe what I was seeing. The longer I went, the faster I got--and not just a tiny bit faster, a whole lot faster. I'd planned to aim for a 5:30/km pace, since it was a fairly long run. I stuck to that for about the first 10km, which I did in 54 minutes, but gradually my pace began to speed up, until I realized I'd run the 16th kilometre in 4:42. In fact, I ran each of the last 5.5 kilometres of that half-marathon distance at a 4:45 pace. I couldn't believe it. I have a hard time holding that pace when I run JUST five kilometres on my speed runs.
In the end, I ran 23km in exactly 2 hours! And I finished my half-marathon distance in 1:52:20, which is almost three minutes faster than I ran my real half-marathon a year and a half ago.
I'm feeling much more confident about tackling the Toad right about now.
And I'm getting to experience again what I remember experiencing in my long runs and races last year -- that I would get faster the further I went, not slower. I mean, I was just ticking along. I think my legs were just about numb, to tell the truth. My breath was extremely even. I was just laying down the pace without even thinking about it.
My training plan is to do a couple of shorter speed runs this week (by shorter, I mean 10km, and hopefully at least once at my favourite place to run trails -- because I need the hill work).
Then I will do a shortish long run this coming weekend, between 15-18km.
Then two 12km runs back to back on the following weekend. And then rest up a bit!
Because then it's race weekend.
I will keep aiming to run five times a week, not necessarily for super-long distances. So far, I've been holding steady at four runs a week, which isn't fabulous, but hey. Seems to be working okay.
I wanted to run 2 hours to try to see if I felt prepared for the Toad, which is in just under four weeks from now. As I got going and settled in to the run, I continued to feel really good, and I decided to aim for a half-marathon distance at minimum. The kilometres really started ticking away by the time I'd gotten into the teens. I'd set my watch to give me my split for every kilometre, and I couldn't believe what I was seeing. The longer I went, the faster I got--and not just a tiny bit faster, a whole lot faster. I'd planned to aim for a 5:30/km pace, since it was a fairly long run. I stuck to that for about the first 10km, which I did in 54 minutes, but gradually my pace began to speed up, until I realized I'd run the 16th kilometre in 4:42. In fact, I ran each of the last 5.5 kilometres of that half-marathon distance at a 4:45 pace. I couldn't believe it. I have a hard time holding that pace when I run JUST five kilometres on my speed runs.
In the end, I ran 23km in exactly 2 hours! And I finished my half-marathon distance in 1:52:20, which is almost three minutes faster than I ran my real half-marathon a year and a half ago.
I'm feeling much more confident about tackling the Toad right about now.
And I'm getting to experience again what I remember experiencing in my long runs and races last year -- that I would get faster the further I went, not slower. I mean, I was just ticking along. I think my legs were just about numb, to tell the truth. My breath was extremely even. I was just laying down the pace without even thinking about it.
My training plan is to do a couple of shorter speed runs this week (by shorter, I mean 10km, and hopefully at least once at my favourite place to run trails -- because I need the hill work).
Then I will do a shortish long run this coming weekend, between 15-18km.
Then two 12km runs back to back on the following weekend. And then rest up a bit!
Because then it's race weekend.
I will keep aiming to run five times a week, not necessarily for super-long distances. So far, I've been holding steady at four runs a week, which isn't fabulous, but hey. Seems to be working okay.
Tuesday, September 4, 2012
One step and then another
Today has been an excruciating day, and my sense is that I probably won't choose to write about it on my main blog. But I still want to write about it, and acknowledge what's happening, and this blog actually seems like the perfect place to reflect on it.
Today, the longlist for a Canadian literary prize was announced -- the most important literary prize Canada offers for fiction -- and my new book was not on it. I knew it would be a long-shot, but my publisher and agent were both very hopeful. I'm crushed to have disappointed them--and myself. Getting onto the list would boost sales, garner attention, basically help sell books, which is what I'm supposed to do, as a writer (often people forget that part of the equation, but it's pretty critical to me continuing to be able to write, and more to the point, to publish.)
My initial emotion upon hearing the news was shame, which makes no logical sense. A jury of three people chose a handful of books from an eligible pool of 227. It would have been a stroke of great fortune to be among that handful, and not being there, while disappointing, is hardly shameful.
I don't know why that was what I felt. But I did.
A few hours on, I'm doing better. I bounce.
Here's how this experience relates to the training I've been doing recently. I've been doing some hard runs, trying to give a quick-ish bump to my fitness level so I can race the 25 km trail run I'm signed up to run in a few weeks. In the past five days, I've done two 10km runs, trying to run right at my edge, and last night I went 13km, still pushing to my edge. At 10km, my edge is just under 5 min/km -- at least, I can hold on for about 9 km before slowing slightly. At 13km, my edge is just over 5 min/km. I was pleased to have completed 13.1km yesterday in a time of 1 hour, seven minutes. That's two minutes off a five flat pace. Pretty fast for me. And I could hold it, and if I'd thought to bring water along, I could have gone further.
But here's the thing: every step of those runs is hard work. Every single step. There isn't a step that feels easy. I'm pushing myself the whole way. I have remind myself repeatedly to maintain the intesity of effort.
I find I can't even do it another way (unless I'm running with someone else).
My life as a writer is very similar. I push myself. I set goals that may actually be slightly beyond my reach, but I believe in my own ability to get there. When I don't, it's painful. But I can't stop myself from continuing to try, despite setbacks.
Every step of the way is hard. It never gets easier, because as I get stronger, I don't glide; instead, I push a little harder, expect a little more. It seems to be in my character. Failure hurts, but it isn't a real obstacle. The only obstacle is my response to failure. So I took some to feel sad this morning, and I know the sadness is going to grab me now and again in the days and weeks to come. But I'm going to keep on keeping on. One step at a time.
Today, the longlist for a Canadian literary prize was announced -- the most important literary prize Canada offers for fiction -- and my new book was not on it. I knew it would be a long-shot, but my publisher and agent were both very hopeful. I'm crushed to have disappointed them--and myself. Getting onto the list would boost sales, garner attention, basically help sell books, which is what I'm supposed to do, as a writer (often people forget that part of the equation, but it's pretty critical to me continuing to be able to write, and more to the point, to publish.)
My initial emotion upon hearing the news was shame, which makes no logical sense. A jury of three people chose a handful of books from an eligible pool of 227. It would have been a stroke of great fortune to be among that handful, and not being there, while disappointing, is hardly shameful.
I don't know why that was what I felt. But I did.
A few hours on, I'm doing better. I bounce.
Here's how this experience relates to the training I've been doing recently. I've been doing some hard runs, trying to give a quick-ish bump to my fitness level so I can race the 25 km trail run I'm signed up to run in a few weeks. In the past five days, I've done two 10km runs, trying to run right at my edge, and last night I went 13km, still pushing to my edge. At 10km, my edge is just under 5 min/km -- at least, I can hold on for about 9 km before slowing slightly. At 13km, my edge is just over 5 min/km. I was pleased to have completed 13.1km yesterday in a time of 1 hour, seven minutes. That's two minutes off a five flat pace. Pretty fast for me. And I could hold it, and if I'd thought to bring water along, I could have gone further.
But here's the thing: every step of those runs is hard work. Every single step. There isn't a step that feels easy. I'm pushing myself the whole way. I have remind myself repeatedly to maintain the intesity of effort.
I find I can't even do it another way (unless I'm running with someone else).
My life as a writer is very similar. I push myself. I set goals that may actually be slightly beyond my reach, but I believe in my own ability to get there. When I don't, it's painful. But I can't stop myself from continuing to try, despite setbacks.
Every step of the way is hard. It never gets easier, because as I get stronger, I don't glide; instead, I push a little harder, expect a little more. It seems to be in my character. Failure hurts, but it isn't a real obstacle. The only obstacle is my response to failure. So I took some to feel sad this morning, and I know the sadness is going to grab me now and again in the days and weeks to come. But I'm going to keep on keeping on. One step at a time.
Wednesday, August 29, 2012
The best-laid plans
Well, I didn't run every other day last week. We were at a water-access-only cottage for most of the week and I would have had to boat out to run on a country road, which seemed not terribly appealing, especially with lovely hot weather and a lake to swim in instead.
After my 16km run awhile back, I played half a game of soccer the next day without ill effect (half because I got the time wrong and showed up late; oops). I ran fast and hard, however, for 45 minutes without feeling fatigued at all.
The next day I did a 90-minute hot yoga class. It was almost too easy, though. Nice, but easy. I did discover that my hips are ridiculously tight. Ugh.
I also got a few runs in, but not the five I'd planned: 9km slow; 7km in 35:35; 7km in 35:25. And a spin/weight class that really kicked my ass (we had a substitute teacher ...).
Then I spent a day canning, and the next day at a soccer tournament and packing and driving, so I got no runs or exercise in whatsoever. When we got to the hotel, I'd planned to run on the treadmill -- and the gym was already closed. I was pretty grumpy and irritable. Sitting does not suit me!
But on the first two full days of our holiday, I actually had back-to-back excellent runs in two different but very beautiful locations. On Monday morning, I ran off the stress of the long car ride by going 10km in 48:40. That's less than a minute off my fastest (okay, only) race time, so I was really pleased; especially pleased because I'd started with my fastest 5km time, speeding through it in 23:29. I couldn't quite maintain the pace, but I hadn't actually planned on running 10km, just got going and decided to keep going. In fact, I even stopped to walk after 9km, which had brought me back to the hotel, then thought, what the heck, I might as well see how fast I crank out a full 10, so I set out again.
The next day I ran 7km in 34:26, on a killer hilly course. I was pleased to be keeping it under 5min/km, which is my "fast."
And then I didn't run again until this morning! Circumstances.
But I did swim. I swam twice a day for about half an hour each swim. Two days in a row I also did a long distance swim that took me longer than half an hour. The second and last long distance swim actually turned out to be kind of scary. Luckily I had my husband along in a kayak (because there are motorboats and skiidoos on this lake too, and a tiny bobbing swimmer's cap isn't terribly visible). My arms must have been more tired than I'd realized from the previous days long distance swim, and the water was really cold. I started gasping when I put my head under -- but I was already way out in the middle of the lake by that point. Luckily, I could hold onto the back of the kayak -- my husband pulled me part of the way home until I was ready to try swimming again. The water is very deep and I found it kind of spooky looking down on all that dark nothingness. (That might have been making me gasp, actually, as much as the cold.) My imagination is way too over-active! I think it was my mental state more than my physical state that affected that swim, and which I couldn't seem to overcome.
Anyway, my advice is: never ever ever swim alone! I didn't do any of my swims alone, even the ones closer to shore, and I kept a close eye on my husband on his swims too.
But I'd do it again -- attempt the long distance lake swim. The first day I had some similar panicked moments looking down into the dark depths, but I was able to overcome my panic, and once I got over it, I felt like I could have kept swimming forever. My limbs were kind of frozen from the cold, but the rhythm felt very serene, as if it could be sustained for a very long time. I liked it. But I'm not making crazy August plans to swim across Lake Ontario next summer or anything ...
One other running note: I've noticed that my left knee aches after a slow run, but it doesn't hurt at all after a fast one. Curious, huh. The slow runs almost feel harder on my body.
After my 16km run awhile back, I played half a game of soccer the next day without ill effect (half because I got the time wrong and showed up late; oops). I ran fast and hard, however, for 45 minutes without feeling fatigued at all.
The next day I did a 90-minute hot yoga class. It was almost too easy, though. Nice, but easy. I did discover that my hips are ridiculously tight. Ugh.
I also got a few runs in, but not the five I'd planned: 9km slow; 7km in 35:35; 7km in 35:25. And a spin/weight class that really kicked my ass (we had a substitute teacher ...).
Then I spent a day canning, and the next day at a soccer tournament and packing and driving, so I got no runs or exercise in whatsoever. When we got to the hotel, I'd planned to run on the treadmill -- and the gym was already closed. I was pretty grumpy and irritable. Sitting does not suit me!
But on the first two full days of our holiday, I actually had back-to-back excellent runs in two different but very beautiful locations. On Monday morning, I ran off the stress of the long car ride by going 10km in 48:40. That's less than a minute off my fastest (okay, only) race time, so I was really pleased; especially pleased because I'd started with my fastest 5km time, speeding through it in 23:29. I couldn't quite maintain the pace, but I hadn't actually planned on running 10km, just got going and decided to keep going. In fact, I even stopped to walk after 9km, which had brought me back to the hotel, then thought, what the heck, I might as well see how fast I crank out a full 10, so I set out again.
The next day I ran 7km in 34:26, on a killer hilly course. I was pleased to be keeping it under 5min/km, which is my "fast."
And then I didn't run again until this morning! Circumstances.
But I did swim. I swam twice a day for about half an hour each swim. Two days in a row I also did a long distance swim that took me longer than half an hour. The second and last long distance swim actually turned out to be kind of scary. Luckily I had my husband along in a kayak (because there are motorboats and skiidoos on this lake too, and a tiny bobbing swimmer's cap isn't terribly visible). My arms must have been more tired than I'd realized from the previous days long distance swim, and the water was really cold. I started gasping when I put my head under -- but I was already way out in the middle of the lake by that point. Luckily, I could hold onto the back of the kayak -- my husband pulled me part of the way home until I was ready to try swimming again. The water is very deep and I found it kind of spooky looking down on all that dark nothingness. (That might have been making me gasp, actually, as much as the cold.) My imagination is way too over-active! I think it was my mental state more than my physical state that affected that swim, and which I couldn't seem to overcome.
Anyway, my advice is: never ever ever swim alone! I didn't do any of my swims alone, even the ones closer to shore, and I kept a close eye on my husband on his swims too.
But I'd do it again -- attempt the long distance lake swim. The first day I had some similar panicked moments looking down into the dark depths, but I was able to overcome my panic, and once I got over it, I felt like I could have kept swimming forever. My limbs were kind of frozen from the cold, but the rhythm felt very serene, as if it could be sustained for a very long time. I liked it. But I'm not making crazy August plans to swim across Lake Ontario next summer or anything ...
One other running note: I've noticed that my left knee aches after a slow run, but it doesn't hurt at all after a fast one. Curious, huh. The slow runs almost feel harder on my body.
Monday, August 13, 2012
Summer blues
August. Never my happiest month. I think I keep expecting something of myself come September: some new and exciting direction, some elaborate plan, some back-to-school nerves. But of course, I'm an adult, pretty much set in my routines and schedules, and August just means, well, the end of summer.
Two years ago in August I had the brilliant idea that I wanted to complete a triathlon. Amazingly, I achieved the goal in less than a year, despite having to learn how to swim. Two summers later, I love swimming.
July was all about swimming. I'm hoping to continue swimming at least a few times this week, in the outdoor pool, and lots next week, in a lake (which is a very different experience). Because it doesn't involve the same pounding that running does, I can do it every day. I'm not so sure about running every day.
But I discovered something, reading about those Olympic marathoners and 5,000/10,000 metre specialists: they run not just every day, but three times a day. Yipes. I'll bet that would make me faster ... or injure me in the process. And I can't possibly devote that kind of time to the pursuit of speed, not at this late date in my athletic life. I'm not exactly in my prime anymore.
This past week, my goal was to run every other day. I started last Saturday with the 35 minute treadmill run. Monday I ran 10km in a respectable 52 minutes (respectable, but not especially fast for me.) Then I ran Tuesday (oops), 5km, brutal. I'd just eaten supper, and thought I was going to throw up. Not pretty. Not fast either. Got up the next morning, Wednesday, and ran 9km with my friend (we always go slowly, for which I was truly grateful). A few hours later, I swam 1600m at the pool, and felt terrific, not at all tired and achy, which surprised me. Bouyancy, I guess. Then I subbed in my spin/kettlebell class on Thursday, ran out of time to squeeze in a run on Friday, and instead got up early on Saturday and ran 16km. I didn't even let myself think about it in advance, just got up, put on running clothes, ate banana, took a drink along, and went out. I told my husband I'd be going 10-12km, because that was all I could bear to think of running myself.
And then I got going. And then 16km seemed pretty manageable. In fact, I was quite sure I could have run a half-marathon distance without harming myself. That said, the pounding on my joints feels greater, lately, than I remember it feeling last summer when I was training for distance, and I wonder: is it age? Is it just that I've forgotten how the pounding feels? Is it having been injured? I wonder whether I read my body's signals differently post-injury. A bit of fear added in, somehow.
In any case, I was thrilled to have gone 16km. And I played my soccer game yesterday without ill effect. I didn't fatigued or worn out in the least.
Soccer has changed my training, a bit. I've been hesitant to do long runs the day before a soccer game (which is a long run in and of itself -- 90 minutes of interval training, essentially, tons of sprints, and movement up and down the field). But on Saturday I decided just to train for today, not worry about tomorrow. I need to maintain that mentality and get out for more long runs. I think if I can get a couple around 20km, and continue running at least five times a week, I'll be able to complete the Run for the Toad at the end of September. The only issue will be me giving myself permission to complete it in a slower time than last year's. There is no way I can duplicate the kind of training I'd done going into last year's race, mainly because I lost out on the winter training due to the hip injury, and I can't pretend it's there to back me up. I also haven't raced all season.
But if I can accept running the Toad at least 15 minutes slower this year, I should be physically able to complete it. Here's hoping I can show up mentally. And enjoy it for what it is.
Today's plan: a short run after supper. Or a hot yoga class to stretch out. I'm missing that too, in my training. It might be more beneficial than a run, today, frankly.
Two years ago in August I had the brilliant idea that I wanted to complete a triathlon. Amazingly, I achieved the goal in less than a year, despite having to learn how to swim. Two summers later, I love swimming.
July was all about swimming. I'm hoping to continue swimming at least a few times this week, in the outdoor pool, and lots next week, in a lake (which is a very different experience). Because it doesn't involve the same pounding that running does, I can do it every day. I'm not so sure about running every day.
But I discovered something, reading about those Olympic marathoners and 5,000/10,000 metre specialists: they run not just every day, but three times a day. Yipes. I'll bet that would make me faster ... or injure me in the process. And I can't possibly devote that kind of time to the pursuit of speed, not at this late date in my athletic life. I'm not exactly in my prime anymore.
This past week, my goal was to run every other day. I started last Saturday with the 35 minute treadmill run. Monday I ran 10km in a respectable 52 minutes (respectable, but not especially fast for me.) Then I ran Tuesday (oops), 5km, brutal. I'd just eaten supper, and thought I was going to throw up. Not pretty. Not fast either. Got up the next morning, Wednesday, and ran 9km with my friend (we always go slowly, for which I was truly grateful). A few hours later, I swam 1600m at the pool, and felt terrific, not at all tired and achy, which surprised me. Bouyancy, I guess. Then I subbed in my spin/kettlebell class on Thursday, ran out of time to squeeze in a run on Friday, and instead got up early on Saturday and ran 16km. I didn't even let myself think about it in advance, just got up, put on running clothes, ate banana, took a drink along, and went out. I told my husband I'd be going 10-12km, because that was all I could bear to think of running myself.
And then I got going. And then 16km seemed pretty manageable. In fact, I was quite sure I could have run a half-marathon distance without harming myself. That said, the pounding on my joints feels greater, lately, than I remember it feeling last summer when I was training for distance, and I wonder: is it age? Is it just that I've forgotten how the pounding feels? Is it having been injured? I wonder whether I read my body's signals differently post-injury. A bit of fear added in, somehow.
In any case, I was thrilled to have gone 16km. And I played my soccer game yesterday without ill effect. I didn't fatigued or worn out in the least.
Soccer has changed my training, a bit. I've been hesitant to do long runs the day before a soccer game (which is a long run in and of itself -- 90 minutes of interval training, essentially, tons of sprints, and movement up and down the field). But on Saturday I decided just to train for today, not worry about tomorrow. I need to maintain that mentality and get out for more long runs. I think if I can get a couple around 20km, and continue running at least five times a week, I'll be able to complete the Run for the Toad at the end of September. The only issue will be me giving myself permission to complete it in a slower time than last year's. There is no way I can duplicate the kind of training I'd done going into last year's race, mainly because I lost out on the winter training due to the hip injury, and I can't pretend it's there to back me up. I also haven't raced all season.
But if I can accept running the Toad at least 15 minutes slower this year, I should be physically able to complete it. Here's hoping I can show up mentally. And enjoy it for what it is.
Today's plan: a short run after supper. Or a hot yoga class to stretch out. I'm missing that too, in my training. It might be more beneficial than a run, today, frankly.
Tuesday, August 7, 2012
Ego boost and ego bust
I had a never-before-experienced moment on Saturday evening. We were staying in a hotel for my daughter's soccer tournament. We'd spent the entire day waiting, pacing, watching, sitting beside soccer fields, ie. zero exercise. It was brutally hot anyway. I'd brought my running gear but decided to wait til the evening and run on a treadmill at the hotel.
I was the only person in the exercise room. I have no idea how far or fast I ran because it seemed to be in miles. All I know is that it felt fabulous to run off all that angst and anxiety and restlessness, and that I kept pushing the button to go faster. At the end I ran a few intervals, fast, then slow, then fast, then slow. I was pouring with sweat when I stepped off the machine.
I walked to the elevator with another woman and her two children, who were coming from the pool. She said, "You look like you've come from a sauna."
"Nope. Just went for a fast run," I told her. I was feeling a little self-conscious, as I always do when I'm pouring sweat in my exercise clothes. (This situation happens to me often at soccer practice, and I always take care to stand a small distance away from other parents, because, frankly, what I need is a shower.)
On the elevator, she said, "Do you run a lot then?"
"Yes," I said. "I swim too." I almost added "and I swing weights around once a week, and sometimes do spin class," but I didn't want to sound like an exercise maniac.
"That must be how you got this fabulous body," she said. "You have a fabulous body!"
The women's heptathlon went on Saturday. Now those women--they have fabulous bodies. I would trade bodies with them. Who wouldn't want Jessica Zelinka's abs? But I must say that it was quite an ego boost. Out of the blue, being complimented on my body, which is not a fashion model body by any means -- it's strong and muscular. That was quite the ego boost.
In the ego busting section, despite having worked my body into what looks like its athletic prime, I can't seem to run any faster. Why??? I'm working so hard! Sometimes I think my body is a bit of a fake-out for anyone looking on. I look faster and stronger than I actually am. Here's the thing. I didn't start this project to look fabulous. I started it to become an athlete. That's still my goal.
After the success of the swimming experiment, I've decided to start laying on some miles. I plan to run every other day for the next couple of weeks, in hopes that it boosts my fitness in that regard. Otherwise, I can write off the chance to run that 25km trail run in less than eight weeks ...
I was the only person in the exercise room. I have no idea how far or fast I ran because it seemed to be in miles. All I know is that it felt fabulous to run off all that angst and anxiety and restlessness, and that I kept pushing the button to go faster. At the end I ran a few intervals, fast, then slow, then fast, then slow. I was pouring with sweat when I stepped off the machine.
I walked to the elevator with another woman and her two children, who were coming from the pool. She said, "You look like you've come from a sauna."
"Nope. Just went for a fast run," I told her. I was feeling a little self-conscious, as I always do when I'm pouring sweat in my exercise clothes. (This situation happens to me often at soccer practice, and I always take care to stand a small distance away from other parents, because, frankly, what I need is a shower.)
On the elevator, she said, "Do you run a lot then?"
"Yes," I said. "I swim too." I almost added "and I swing weights around once a week, and sometimes do spin class," but I didn't want to sound like an exercise maniac.
"That must be how you got this fabulous body," she said. "You have a fabulous body!"
The women's heptathlon went on Saturday. Now those women--they have fabulous bodies. I would trade bodies with them. Who wouldn't want Jessica Zelinka's abs? But I must say that it was quite an ego boost. Out of the blue, being complimented on my body, which is not a fashion model body by any means -- it's strong and muscular. That was quite the ego boost.
In the ego busting section, despite having worked my body into what looks like its athletic prime, I can't seem to run any faster. Why??? I'm working so hard! Sometimes I think my body is a bit of a fake-out for anyone looking on. I look faster and stronger than I actually am. Here's the thing. I didn't start this project to look fabulous. I started it to become an athlete. That's still my goal.
After the success of the swimming experiment, I've decided to start laying on some miles. I plan to run every other day for the next couple of weeks, in hopes that it boosts my fitness in that regard. Otherwise, I can write off the chance to run that 25km trail run in less than eight weeks ...
Tuesday, July 31, 2012
Swim yourself fit
Just a quick note about swimming -- again!
The kids are done their swim lessons, but my husband and I have enjoyed swimming so much that we're keeping it going this week. Yesterday was our anniversary, so we met for a swim, and then went for lunch. We can't do that every day, but the swim portion took us about an hour, so we figure we can squeeze that in quite often. I plan to meet him again today for another swim.
Yesterday I tried out a new arm position on my pull. I've been watching the Olympic swimmers and noticed that they use a much deep pull than I've been using. So I tried going a bit deeper, with my elbows bent, yesterday, and it felt like I was getting a more powerful pull. I was definitely going faster too. I ploughed through my usual 1600m (which is all I've had time to do during the kids' swim lessons) almost too fast, and wished I'd gone to 2000m. That's my plan for today, assuming the arms hold out. It is more tiring, and uses the back muscles slightly differently.
I think as a method of bumping up my fitness, regardless of how fast I'm able to go, swimming every week day for the past three weeks has been fantastic. At soccer on Sunday, I was able to run and run and run. I didn't feel winded, and I still had sprints left in me even at the end of the game.
I haven't done a long run since that 18.5km a couple of weekends ago when I was seriously dehydrated and felt awful by the end. Instead I've been doing much shorter speed runs. On Thursday, I ended with a number of sprints up a hill. Fun. Seriously. I think that kind of training helps with my soccer fitness, and vice versa -- the soccer games themselves help with my ability to sprint and recover. If I could just find time to add in the long runs ...
Well, it's never perfect. But I've also been doing my strength and stretching stuff more regularly. Need to after soccer -- want to, in fact. Otherwise I'm stiff as a board. I got a new foam roller that I'm using to roll out my glutes and IT band. I make the most awful noises while rolling on there, plus I look totally awkward. Ah, fitness ....
The kids are done their swim lessons, but my husband and I have enjoyed swimming so much that we're keeping it going this week. Yesterday was our anniversary, so we met for a swim, and then went for lunch. We can't do that every day, but the swim portion took us about an hour, so we figure we can squeeze that in quite often. I plan to meet him again today for another swim.
Yesterday I tried out a new arm position on my pull. I've been watching the Olympic swimmers and noticed that they use a much deep pull than I've been using. So I tried going a bit deeper, with my elbows bent, yesterday, and it felt like I was getting a more powerful pull. I was definitely going faster too. I ploughed through my usual 1600m (which is all I've had time to do during the kids' swim lessons) almost too fast, and wished I'd gone to 2000m. That's my plan for today, assuming the arms hold out. It is more tiring, and uses the back muscles slightly differently.
I think as a method of bumping up my fitness, regardless of how fast I'm able to go, swimming every week day for the past three weeks has been fantastic. At soccer on Sunday, I was able to run and run and run. I didn't feel winded, and I still had sprints left in me even at the end of the game.
I haven't done a long run since that 18.5km a couple of weekends ago when I was seriously dehydrated and felt awful by the end. Instead I've been doing much shorter speed runs. On Thursday, I ended with a number of sprints up a hill. Fun. Seriously. I think that kind of training helps with my soccer fitness, and vice versa -- the soccer games themselves help with my ability to sprint and recover. If I could just find time to add in the long runs ...
Well, it's never perfect. But I've also been doing my strength and stretching stuff more regularly. Need to after soccer -- want to, in fact. Otherwise I'm stiff as a board. I got a new foam roller that I'm using to roll out my glutes and IT band. I make the most awful noises while rolling on there, plus I look totally awkward. Ah, fitness ....
Wednesday, July 25, 2012
Every day swimming
Summer is flying. It's so bittersweet that we're nearing the end of the kids' two week swim session. I've never swum so much in my entire life! Last week, I swam for all four days that my kids were lessons, and I'm keeping the same pace this week, though it's a shorter swim than the very first week that I swam five days straight. So I've been averaging 1600m/swim, and it goes by very quickly. Yesterday I tried out a different kick, which admittedly took more energy, but earned me an extra 200m in the same amount of time.
Today, however, I was outpaced by a very large, much older woman who was barely putting her head in the water. To be fair, she was going pretty fast. I comforted myself by thinking that perhaps she was a champion swimmer once upon a time. Also, I ran 9km this morning.
My soccer game on Sunday was a disappointment. I wasn't beat up at all, but I had the sense it was in part because I hadn't pushed nearly as hard. I could feel the fear in my body's responses and reaction time. I knew I wasn't running quite as hard as I could have, and was therefore missing contact with the ball as often as not. Lame. The second half was better as I forced myself to get back into the game and not act out of fear. Might as well not play if I'm playing scared.
I also ran a bit more last week, though not a ton, it must be said. I'm not entirely sure I'll be prepared for the Toad (25km trail run) at the end of September. I'm really not layering on the miles like I should be. On the other hand, I'm loving the swimming, and I don't have time for everything. Maybe the cross-training is helping, at least a bit?
Last week I ran 9km (slow, with my friend) on Wednesday, and also swam that day. I did the spittlebell class (spin + weights) on Thursday, swam, and also ran that evening, 6.5km with sprints to warm up (and a 14-minute-flat pace for the first 3km, ending 5km in 24:19)--not bad. I ran Saturday afternoon in some serious heat, but my GPS watch wasn't working and we were at a park, so I couldn't track the run. I just ran a half hour, and tried to push the pace past my comfort level. I ran non-stop in the soccer game on Sunday evening--lots of sprints in that style of running. My lungs felt better right from the start, too, so I think a couple of runs during the week really make a difference, even if they aren't serious distance runs. I also practiced soccer with the kids, lots of sprints, on Monday night.
And that, plus the 4 x 1600m swims, was my week.
This week is shaping up to be pretty similar, with an extra swim on Monday (the kids didn't start their swim lessons until Tuesday of last week, so I skipped that swim).
My husband and I have enjoyed swimming so much that we're hoping to continue, at least a couple of times a week, while the pool is open and summer remains with us! It's too beautiful to waste. It's like seasonal eating. Seasonal exercise. Enjoy it while you've got it.
Plus my arms have never looked better. Not that that's why I exercise, mind you, but, damn, it's true.
Today, however, I was outpaced by a very large, much older woman who was barely putting her head in the water. To be fair, she was going pretty fast. I comforted myself by thinking that perhaps she was a champion swimmer once upon a time. Also, I ran 9km this morning.
My soccer game on Sunday was a disappointment. I wasn't beat up at all, but I had the sense it was in part because I hadn't pushed nearly as hard. I could feel the fear in my body's responses and reaction time. I knew I wasn't running quite as hard as I could have, and was therefore missing contact with the ball as often as not. Lame. The second half was better as I forced myself to get back into the game and not act out of fear. Might as well not play if I'm playing scared.
I also ran a bit more last week, though not a ton, it must be said. I'm not entirely sure I'll be prepared for the Toad (25km trail run) at the end of September. I'm really not layering on the miles like I should be. On the other hand, I'm loving the swimming, and I don't have time for everything. Maybe the cross-training is helping, at least a bit?
Last week I ran 9km (slow, with my friend) on Wednesday, and also swam that day. I did the spittlebell class (spin + weights) on Thursday, swam, and also ran that evening, 6.5km with sprints to warm up (and a 14-minute-flat pace for the first 3km, ending 5km in 24:19)--not bad. I ran Saturday afternoon in some serious heat, but my GPS watch wasn't working and we were at a park, so I couldn't track the run. I just ran a half hour, and tried to push the pace past my comfort level. I ran non-stop in the soccer game on Sunday evening--lots of sprints in that style of running. My lungs felt better right from the start, too, so I think a couple of runs during the week really make a difference, even if they aren't serious distance runs. I also practiced soccer with the kids, lots of sprints, on Monday night.
And that, plus the 4 x 1600m swims, was my week.
This week is shaping up to be pretty similar, with an extra swim on Monday (the kids didn't start their swim lessons until Tuesday of last week, so I skipped that swim).
My husband and I have enjoyed swimming so much that we're hoping to continue, at least a couple of times a week, while the pool is open and summer remains with us! It's too beautiful to waste. It's like seasonal eating. Seasonal exercise. Enjoy it while you've got it.
Plus my arms have never looked better. Not that that's why I exercise, mind you, but, damn, it's true.
Monday, July 16, 2012
Swimmingly
It sure was fun to swim every day last week. I ended up swimming five days in a row, averaging 2200m each session. The pleasure of swimming in the outdoor pool on these crazy hot, dry days cannot be improved upon. It even inspired me to buy a bikini after I discovered my bathing suit was literally disintegrating and leaving black tarry marks all over my back. I could feel my cardio-vascular improvements over the week.
But I only ran once last week, believe it or not. I did a speed run on Thursday evening in insane heat, on a hilly trail. I was laying down a just-under 5 min/km pace, even with the hills, for the first 4 km, but then I kind of tanked. I was surprised I made it 5, actually, though the end time was reasonable, just over 25 minutes. Thursday was my super-hero day. I started with the spin/weight class, swam 2300m, then finished with the run. But I totally forgot to stretch! I was stiff the next day.
That said, I remembered to stretch virtually every other day last week, and feel better for it.
At yesterday's soccer game, I thought I'd feel all fit and fresh, but the weird thing is that I felt pretty winded, pretty fast. It was only by the second half that I started to feel better, and even then, it was relative. I think I'd just gotten used to feeling winded and realized I could keep playing winded and not hit a wall. Instead, I got slammed by the opposing team, not once but twice. I'm bruised and battered today, and wondering whether it's worth it to risk being concussed ... as a speedy forward, I'm a moving a target, and I've found that the less skilled a defender, the more likely she is to push, slide-tackle, or otherwise maim the incoming player. These are usually big women, too. My happiest moment in yesterday's game was when two defenders attempted to make a Carrie sandwich of me, on one of my runs to the net, but I slipped through and they ran into each other instead. No, I wasn't sorry in the least.
On the soccer front, this past week I practiced running with the ball -- it's all about touch. At AppleApple's Monday night soccer practice, I take the other kids, and we practice on a field nearby too. So on Monday, we basically ran up and down the field, taking shots on the net. I also got the kids to throw balls at me so I could practice receiving and turning them with my body. I still need a lot of work on that skill, but Kevin said I was positioning myself better on the field already, with my body facing to turn rather than facing my own net head-on. And I had a breakaway where I controlled the ball perfectly while running up the field, and was able to take a decent shot (which was saved). It wasn't the greatest shot, but it was not bad, and I was most proud of having keep control of the ball and maintained speed on that run.
Here is what I need to work on, likely by visualizing it: running before the ball is kicked. We have a great player on our team, head and shoulders above the rest of us. She plays midfield, and she's able to control the flow of the game, but she needs someone to pass to in order to create goal-scoring changes. I'm striving to be that someone. My problem is that I hesitate. She'll say: Carrie, go! as she prepares to kick the ball. But instead I wait to where the ball will go and then run after it. This is frustrating for her, and doesn't do a ton of good. Kevin explained why. My job is to make space. So by running into space, I'm giving her somewhere to kick the ball to -- not the other way round. In other words, I need to create the play, not wait to see what's going to happen. Plus, if I'm moving, my defender will have to move too, and it will throw her off. That's my goal for next game -- run into space without hesitation.
Can't really practice that tonight, so instead I'll practice running with the ball, shooting/passing into the net, and receiving and turning the ball.
Which reminds me -- I guess I did run on Monday night, if sprinting back and forth down a soccer field counts. I think it does, even though I have no idea how far or how fast I was running ...
Not sure what my training plan is for this week. A couple more runs needed, methinks, in addition to the swims. Physio exercises to be continued. And swims to be enjoyed!
But I only ran once last week, believe it or not. I did a speed run on Thursday evening in insane heat, on a hilly trail. I was laying down a just-under 5 min/km pace, even with the hills, for the first 4 km, but then I kind of tanked. I was surprised I made it 5, actually, though the end time was reasonable, just over 25 minutes. Thursday was my super-hero day. I started with the spin/weight class, swam 2300m, then finished with the run. But I totally forgot to stretch! I was stiff the next day.
That said, I remembered to stretch virtually every other day last week, and feel better for it.
At yesterday's soccer game, I thought I'd feel all fit and fresh, but the weird thing is that I felt pretty winded, pretty fast. It was only by the second half that I started to feel better, and even then, it was relative. I think I'd just gotten used to feeling winded and realized I could keep playing winded and not hit a wall. Instead, I got slammed by the opposing team, not once but twice. I'm bruised and battered today, and wondering whether it's worth it to risk being concussed ... as a speedy forward, I'm a moving a target, and I've found that the less skilled a defender, the more likely she is to push, slide-tackle, or otherwise maim the incoming player. These are usually big women, too. My happiest moment in yesterday's game was when two defenders attempted to make a Carrie sandwich of me, on one of my runs to the net, but I slipped through and they ran into each other instead. No, I wasn't sorry in the least.
On the soccer front, this past week I practiced running with the ball -- it's all about touch. At AppleApple's Monday night soccer practice, I take the other kids, and we practice on a field nearby too. So on Monday, we basically ran up and down the field, taking shots on the net. I also got the kids to throw balls at me so I could practice receiving and turning them with my body. I still need a lot of work on that skill, but Kevin said I was positioning myself better on the field already, with my body facing to turn rather than facing my own net head-on. And I had a breakaway where I controlled the ball perfectly while running up the field, and was able to take a decent shot (which was saved). It wasn't the greatest shot, but it was not bad, and I was most proud of having keep control of the ball and maintained speed on that run.
Here is what I need to work on, likely by visualizing it: running before the ball is kicked. We have a great player on our team, head and shoulders above the rest of us. She plays midfield, and she's able to control the flow of the game, but she needs someone to pass to in order to create goal-scoring changes. I'm striving to be that someone. My problem is that I hesitate. She'll say: Carrie, go! as she prepares to kick the ball. But instead I wait to where the ball will go and then run after it. This is frustrating for her, and doesn't do a ton of good. Kevin explained why. My job is to make space. So by running into space, I'm giving her somewhere to kick the ball to -- not the other way round. In other words, I need to create the play, not wait to see what's going to happen. Plus, if I'm moving, my defender will have to move too, and it will throw her off. That's my goal for next game -- run into space without hesitation.
Can't really practice that tonight, so instead I'll practice running with the ball, shooting/passing into the net, and receiving and turning the ball.
Which reminds me -- I guess I did run on Monday night, if sprinting back and forth down a soccer field counts. I think it does, even though I have no idea how far or how fast I was running ...
Not sure what my training plan is for this week. A couple more runs needed, methinks, in addition to the swims. Physio exercises to be continued. And swims to be enjoyed!
Monday, July 9, 2012
That fit/not fit feeling
I've been reflecting on how I don't feel fit at the moment. And how that's really fairly insane, given what my body is capable of doing. But the more I've accomplished, the higher my standards become. Sometimes, on my runs these days, I have to remind myself of all the reasons I'm not hitting my mental targets for speed and (sometimes, less frequently) distance. I'll remind myself that I continue to nurse injuries, that it's insanely hot and humid, that I did a hard work-out the day before -- whatever the "excuse" may be. Because it's not really an excuse, it's the situation. I keep trying to remind myself how excellent it is to get out and exercise no matter what. No matter that I can't hit my top pace every day, and every run. No matter that some days I'm more sluggish than others.
The important thing remains that I'm continuing to exercise -- and continuing to enjoy it.
Part of the enjoyment, of course, comes from seeing progress, so it's hard when I'm working hard and not seeing that progress. I wonder whether I've peaked as an athlete? Maybe. Maybe it doesn't matter.
I'm enjoying the new challenge that soccer provides. I finally let my husband (who is a talented soccer player and coach) come out and watch a game yesterday. I really wanted him to, actually. I sense that I have some raw talent, but there are holes in my skills and tactical understanding of the game that I just knew he could help me with. (If I could accept the advice!) It's hard to accept advice -- or hard not to hear only the criticism, so it helped to hear everything I was already doing right mixed into the advice too. I'm speedy, I challenge for the ball and win it often, I'm aggressive, and I work hard. But I'm not running the angles, and I need to practice certain skills -- directing the ball with my body when receiving it; turning with the ball; and running with the ball. I also need to shoot more frequently when coming in on the net -- my tendency is to pass it instead, because I don't want to be seen as a ball hog. Duh. They have me up front as a striker because they want me to shoot the ball and score! I needed that reminder yesterday.
I'm also interested in the tactical elements of the game, and hope to work with teammates on a few ideas. For example, my husband tells me that forwards shouldn't be tied to one side of the field, but should be constantly looking for ways to make space for each other, even if that means running to the opposite side of the field, either to follow the play, or to make space. It confuses the defenders. It opens up the game.
So what I'm learning, about seven games in, is getting more sophisticated.
I'm trying to maintain my weekend long run, but it's a challenge with the soccer game falling on Sunday afternoons. So I've been trying to run on Saturdays. This Saturday I worked up to 18.5km, but it was a very humid and hot afternoon, and even though I went out with lots of hydration on board, I kept experiencing worrisome symptoms throughout the run -- chills, mostly. My pace was dreadful. I was never better than 5:30/km, and was often as slow as 5:45, even 5:50 for my last 3km split. I've rarely felt so drained at the end of a run, just trying to keep my feet turning over. It was disappointing to say the least. I also felt my hip the next day, which reminds me that I haven't done physio exercises for ages.
Add that to the mix, daily is my plan. I did both yoga stretches and physio exercises yesterday. Stretching post-soccer is key to my injury-free soccer plan. My IT band was bothering me two weeks ago. All it took was some yoga (at home) and everything kind of snapped back into place. But my quad muscle is still bothering me, and slowing me on the runs.
I'm also excited to add swimming back into the mix on a more regular basis for the next three weeks. I'll get to swim four times this week, accompanying my daughter to her hour-long swim lessons. Today I changed after we got there, and it was feedback day (argh!) so my swim was cut a bit short, but I put in 1800m. I LOVE swimming outdoors in the 50m pool. Nothing compares. LOVE IT. I'll get four swims this week, and then half hour swims for the following two weeks while the little kids are in their swim lessons. I just know it's going to bump up my fitness level. And it's easy on the legs. Would love to swim daily all summer long. Was fantasizing about going with husband over lunch hour, wondering how much time that would take out of our work days and whether we could fit it in this summer.
I'm training toward the 25 km Toad, and also hoping to run the Hamilton marathon this fall. But I don't feel as strong as I did last summer -- I haven't had the same race schedule, and I haven't done a single outdoor bike ride yet this summer. I think the cross-training last year contributed to my speed and endurance, and really, I've mainly been running. It's easy, and I can fit it in around my kids' crazy soccer schedules. I've been too tired to do many early mornings.
Anyway, back to the fit/not fit question. I was thinking about how insane it is to think of myself as "not that fit." Which is what I'll admit I'm feeling as I hack along at 5:45/km. But I'm 37 years old, and I'm able to run 18.5km on Saturday, play 90 minutes of hard-running soccer 24 hours later, and then swim 1800m less than 24 hours after that. I think most people would consider that relatively fit, right??
So I'm going to try to, too. Rather than measuring it all in speeds and splits, I'm going to be happy with continuing to be able to exercise regularly, at whatever level my body is able to manage.
The important thing remains that I'm continuing to exercise -- and continuing to enjoy it.
Part of the enjoyment, of course, comes from seeing progress, so it's hard when I'm working hard and not seeing that progress. I wonder whether I've peaked as an athlete? Maybe. Maybe it doesn't matter.
I'm enjoying the new challenge that soccer provides. I finally let my husband (who is a talented soccer player and coach) come out and watch a game yesterday. I really wanted him to, actually. I sense that I have some raw talent, but there are holes in my skills and tactical understanding of the game that I just knew he could help me with. (If I could accept the advice!) It's hard to accept advice -- or hard not to hear only the criticism, so it helped to hear everything I was already doing right mixed into the advice too. I'm speedy, I challenge for the ball and win it often, I'm aggressive, and I work hard. But I'm not running the angles, and I need to practice certain skills -- directing the ball with my body when receiving it; turning with the ball; and running with the ball. I also need to shoot more frequently when coming in on the net -- my tendency is to pass it instead, because I don't want to be seen as a ball hog. Duh. They have me up front as a striker because they want me to shoot the ball and score! I needed that reminder yesterday.
I'm also interested in the tactical elements of the game, and hope to work with teammates on a few ideas. For example, my husband tells me that forwards shouldn't be tied to one side of the field, but should be constantly looking for ways to make space for each other, even if that means running to the opposite side of the field, either to follow the play, or to make space. It confuses the defenders. It opens up the game.
So what I'm learning, about seven games in, is getting more sophisticated.
I'm trying to maintain my weekend long run, but it's a challenge with the soccer game falling on Sunday afternoons. So I've been trying to run on Saturdays. This Saturday I worked up to 18.5km, but it was a very humid and hot afternoon, and even though I went out with lots of hydration on board, I kept experiencing worrisome symptoms throughout the run -- chills, mostly. My pace was dreadful. I was never better than 5:30/km, and was often as slow as 5:45, even 5:50 for my last 3km split. I've rarely felt so drained at the end of a run, just trying to keep my feet turning over. It was disappointing to say the least. I also felt my hip the next day, which reminds me that I haven't done physio exercises for ages.
Add that to the mix, daily is my plan. I did both yoga stretches and physio exercises yesterday. Stretching post-soccer is key to my injury-free soccer plan. My IT band was bothering me two weeks ago. All it took was some yoga (at home) and everything kind of snapped back into place. But my quad muscle is still bothering me, and slowing me on the runs.
I'm also excited to add swimming back into the mix on a more regular basis for the next three weeks. I'll get to swim four times this week, accompanying my daughter to her hour-long swim lessons. Today I changed after we got there, and it was feedback day (argh!) so my swim was cut a bit short, but I put in 1800m. I LOVE swimming outdoors in the 50m pool. Nothing compares. LOVE IT. I'll get four swims this week, and then half hour swims for the following two weeks while the little kids are in their swim lessons. I just know it's going to bump up my fitness level. And it's easy on the legs. Would love to swim daily all summer long. Was fantasizing about going with husband over lunch hour, wondering how much time that would take out of our work days and whether we could fit it in this summer.
I'm training toward the 25 km Toad, and also hoping to run the Hamilton marathon this fall. But I don't feel as strong as I did last summer -- I haven't had the same race schedule, and I haven't done a single outdoor bike ride yet this summer. I think the cross-training last year contributed to my speed and endurance, and really, I've mainly been running. It's easy, and I can fit it in around my kids' crazy soccer schedules. I've been too tired to do many early mornings.
Anyway, back to the fit/not fit question. I was thinking about how insane it is to think of myself as "not that fit." Which is what I'll admit I'm feeling as I hack along at 5:45/km. But I'm 37 years old, and I'm able to run 18.5km on Saturday, play 90 minutes of hard-running soccer 24 hours later, and then swim 1800m less than 24 hours after that. I think most people would consider that relatively fit, right??
So I'm going to try to, too. Rather than measuring it all in speeds and splits, I'm going to be happy with continuing to be able to exercise regularly, at whatever level my body is able to manage.
Monday, June 4, 2012
Learning how to kick
This past week was very much up and down for me, emotionally. By Friday, I felt spent and I did absolutely no exercise on Friday or on Saturday, not even my physio stuff. I was disappointed in myself, but I was also just too tired to move.
I was so glad for the swim on Monday morning. It loosened up my aching leg muscles after the soccer game on Sunday. Turns out I've been kicking the ball wrong. I knew it! I knew it was something in the mechanics. It took a soccer practice yesterday afternoon, and then an impromptu back yard practice with my husband last night after the kids were in bed to crack the code. Honestly, I was swinging so hard and the ball was going nowhere and it was hurting like crazy. Was it where I was planting my foot? Was it the angle of my upper body? Was it where my foot was striking the ball?
The odd thing was that my pass was very accurate and stronger than my kick. Turns out I was passing with my leg at the correct angle, but I was kicking the ball dead on. What helped was not my husband watching what I was doing, but me watching my husband kick the ball properly. I finally said, I can't kick it the way you kick it because you're coming at it from an angle and I just can't do that. Visually, I couldn't understand how to approach the ball except to come at it dead on. That's what made sense to my head. As soon as we realized that was what I was doing, everything changed. I watched my husband kick the ball, and saw how he planted his foot, and his hip acted as a hinge to bring his other leg back on an angle so that he could swing through the ball with full force.
When I was kicking it dead on, I had no force at all, because the hip doesn't hinge that way. There is no way to pull the leg back to give a good swing, so all the power was coming from my much-weakened and inflamed little thigh muscle. Ouch!
As soon as it made sense to my brain, my body was able to do it. It was like a switch flipping. Suddenly, I could strike the ball with force every time. Zero pain. It didn't even feel hard. I'm relieved. I hope this make me an asset to my team, so I can combine my speed with some actual useful soccer skills. Speed only gets me so far.
The week did have a good soccer flavour, though we didn't play a game yesterday (practice instead). On Tuesday evening, I practiced soccer with my daughter for a good forty-five minutes. We had to be at the field very very early due to only having one car and also having three kids playing soccer. As other girls trickled in, they joined our impromptu practice, and it was so fun. We kept adding defenders and forwards and basically doing one drill over and over -- passing the ball around before trying to score (my daughter was practicing her goalkeeping skills). When the real practice started, I headed out for a 5.5km run in the woods.
Got up early the next morning for a run with my friend: 8.8km.
And then "spittlebell" class on Thursday morning. More spinning than weights, which was a bit disappointing. I love the weights. I meant to run that evening, but instead I stayed home with our youngest and did dishes, laundry, and read books with him. One daughter was on a sleepover so she wasn't at her soccer game, which freed me up. It will probably be the only occasion this summer that it happens, so I took advantage of it, and took a break.
But the break stretched out. Friday I didn't get up early to do anything. And it rained and got cold by Saturday. Plus my husband was working. I just had no motivation.
Thankfully, I woke up Sunday morning, early and refreshed, and went for a long run. To get myself out the door, I decided just to run 10km. But as I was running and feeling good, I decided to run my 12km route instead. And then I was feeling so fit that I added some extra loops in at the park on the way home, and went 14.7km. Should have gone around the block just to add in that extra 300m so I could say it was an even 15km.
I had a bit of a break, and then soccer practice. I felt good, and feel fine today too. I did not run fast, and in fact it was a really slow pace. I never got going much faster than 5:30/km. But I think that's okay. The long runs are supposed to be slow. I can't run everything like I'm in a race -- though that is my instinct. While out running, I decided to get back on the bike again too. I also decided to organize a summer running club for my kids and their friends this summer. And I wondered -- why is it so hard, some days, to move at all? To take that first step? To force myself to go?
I never regret it. I always enjoy it.
So with that in mind, I started this week with another swim. I'm still not back on form, though I suspect it might be this wounded wrong-kick leg muscle which is troubling me and slowing me down. But I hung in for the hour, and swam 2600m in 59 minutes.
Planning a soccer practice with the kids tonight -- hoping, really hoping, it doesn't rain. We have to all go to one child's soccer practice, as my husband plays soccer at the same time. Last time, though, it was very fun, and we mostly played soccer too, passing the ball around. I'd like to practice that kick and really sink it into my muscle memory.
I was so glad for the swim on Monday morning. It loosened up my aching leg muscles after the soccer game on Sunday. Turns out I've been kicking the ball wrong. I knew it! I knew it was something in the mechanics. It took a soccer practice yesterday afternoon, and then an impromptu back yard practice with my husband last night after the kids were in bed to crack the code. Honestly, I was swinging so hard and the ball was going nowhere and it was hurting like crazy. Was it where I was planting my foot? Was it the angle of my upper body? Was it where my foot was striking the ball?
The odd thing was that my pass was very accurate and stronger than my kick. Turns out I was passing with my leg at the correct angle, but I was kicking the ball dead on. What helped was not my husband watching what I was doing, but me watching my husband kick the ball properly. I finally said, I can't kick it the way you kick it because you're coming at it from an angle and I just can't do that. Visually, I couldn't understand how to approach the ball except to come at it dead on. That's what made sense to my head. As soon as we realized that was what I was doing, everything changed. I watched my husband kick the ball, and saw how he planted his foot, and his hip acted as a hinge to bring his other leg back on an angle so that he could swing through the ball with full force.
When I was kicking it dead on, I had no force at all, because the hip doesn't hinge that way. There is no way to pull the leg back to give a good swing, so all the power was coming from my much-weakened and inflamed little thigh muscle. Ouch!
As soon as it made sense to my brain, my body was able to do it. It was like a switch flipping. Suddenly, I could strike the ball with force every time. Zero pain. It didn't even feel hard. I'm relieved. I hope this make me an asset to my team, so I can combine my speed with some actual useful soccer skills. Speed only gets me so far.
The week did have a good soccer flavour, though we didn't play a game yesterday (practice instead). On Tuesday evening, I practiced soccer with my daughter for a good forty-five minutes. We had to be at the field very very early due to only having one car and also having three kids playing soccer. As other girls trickled in, they joined our impromptu practice, and it was so fun. We kept adding defenders and forwards and basically doing one drill over and over -- passing the ball around before trying to score (my daughter was practicing her goalkeeping skills). When the real practice started, I headed out for a 5.5km run in the woods.
Got up early the next morning for a run with my friend: 8.8km.
And then "spittlebell" class on Thursday morning. More spinning than weights, which was a bit disappointing. I love the weights. I meant to run that evening, but instead I stayed home with our youngest and did dishes, laundry, and read books with him. One daughter was on a sleepover so she wasn't at her soccer game, which freed me up. It will probably be the only occasion this summer that it happens, so I took advantage of it, and took a break.
But the break stretched out. Friday I didn't get up early to do anything. And it rained and got cold by Saturday. Plus my husband was working. I just had no motivation.
Thankfully, I woke up Sunday morning, early and refreshed, and went for a long run. To get myself out the door, I decided just to run 10km. But as I was running and feeling good, I decided to run my 12km route instead. And then I was feeling so fit that I added some extra loops in at the park on the way home, and went 14.7km. Should have gone around the block just to add in that extra 300m so I could say it was an even 15km.
I had a bit of a break, and then soccer practice. I felt good, and feel fine today too. I did not run fast, and in fact it was a really slow pace. I never got going much faster than 5:30/km. But I think that's okay. The long runs are supposed to be slow. I can't run everything like I'm in a race -- though that is my instinct. While out running, I decided to get back on the bike again too. I also decided to organize a summer running club for my kids and their friends this summer. And I wondered -- why is it so hard, some days, to move at all? To take that first step? To force myself to go?
I never regret it. I always enjoy it.
So with that in mind, I started this week with another swim. I'm still not back on form, though I suspect it might be this wounded wrong-kick leg muscle which is troubling me and slowing me down. But I hung in for the hour, and swam 2600m in 59 minutes.
Planning a soccer practice with the kids tonight -- hoping, really hoping, it doesn't rain. We have to all go to one child's soccer practice, as my husband plays soccer at the same time. Last time, though, it was very fun, and we mostly played soccer too, passing the ball around. I'd like to practice that kick and really sink it into my muscle memory.
Monday, May 28, 2012
Soccer
I've added soccer to my life. And I'm not sure it will fit very well with distance training. I'll admit that my main concern is injury. Soccer involves a lot of quick sprints, sudden stops, exciting turns, and sometimes being crashed to the ground by an opposing player. I came home with blood on my knee yesterday.
I haven't played since the age of ten, one season in a girls' house league. I was fast back then, and my coach suggested I try out for the select team, but my brother was sick at the time, and my parents never followed up. In the years since, I regretted that. In fact, I never played organized team sports again after that season.
I wasn't sure I'd like playing a team sport, but so far it's been really fun. My first game, I was very tentative, and we were totally out-matched by a much more skilled team. But yesterday's game was played against a team of similar skills (and ages), and suddenly -- I was super-fast. I could run past all of the defenders and in for the net. But I couldn't get the damn ball to go in. I made a couple of decent crosses in front of the net, but my inexperience showed. I was placing the ball to close to the goalie.
I did less well the second half. In part because my right thigh was aching. At least this is a new injury! My hip seems quite all right. But the quick sprints use different muscle groups, as does the kicking and passing, and my right leg is getting more of a work out than my left. I'm stiff as a board today.
I got up early this morning for a swim. I was slow in the pool, and my thigh still hurt a bit, but it felt good to be in water, and to stretch out. I went 2600m, slowly. I really enjoyed swimming again, and it felt like good exercise, good for the lungs. I wasn't too tired afterward either, and felt that I could have gone further. But not faster, unfortunately.
I did not do a long run this weekend. Frankly, I was just too tired. I also wasn't sure I'd put on enough miles over the course of the week. Next weeked is a break from soccer, so I'm hoping to run about 15km. I ran 14.5km last weekend, and then played my first soccer game the next day. Bad idea. Might have had something to do with the original leg strain.
I'm finding the distance running challenging. I did keep a good pace throughout the 14.5km run, though, clocking in at about 5:20/km. My aim was 5:30. Even when my legs felt jellyish, my feet kept up the pace.
My hope with the soccer is that I will get comfortable with the sprints, and this will add an element to my training that I'm not currently doing -- interval training. It could be an opportunity to get faster.
Or it could be an opportunity to get hurt. Yes, I feel my age these days. Sigh.
One final note: I'm not doing yoga right now!!! I really miss it, but there is no time to squeeze it in, unless I get up early one extra morning a week, which hasn't been feasible recently. With everyone in soccer, we're often not home and putting kids to be bed until after 9, at which point we still have supper cleanup, dishes, and laundry. I'm falling into bed around 10:30, utterly wiped, with no real downtime. It's felt relentless, honestly. It's a tough pace. Some mornings, therefore, I choose sleep.
I haven't played since the age of ten, one season in a girls' house league. I was fast back then, and my coach suggested I try out for the select team, but my brother was sick at the time, and my parents never followed up. In the years since, I regretted that. In fact, I never played organized team sports again after that season.
I wasn't sure I'd like playing a team sport, but so far it's been really fun. My first game, I was very tentative, and we were totally out-matched by a much more skilled team. But yesterday's game was played against a team of similar skills (and ages), and suddenly -- I was super-fast. I could run past all of the defenders and in for the net. But I couldn't get the damn ball to go in. I made a couple of decent crosses in front of the net, but my inexperience showed. I was placing the ball to close to the goalie.
I did less well the second half. In part because my right thigh was aching. At least this is a new injury! My hip seems quite all right. But the quick sprints use different muscle groups, as does the kicking and passing, and my right leg is getting more of a work out than my left. I'm stiff as a board today.
I got up early this morning for a swim. I was slow in the pool, and my thigh still hurt a bit, but it felt good to be in water, and to stretch out. I went 2600m, slowly. I really enjoyed swimming again, and it felt like good exercise, good for the lungs. I wasn't too tired afterward either, and felt that I could have gone further. But not faster, unfortunately.
I did not do a long run this weekend. Frankly, I was just too tired. I also wasn't sure I'd put on enough miles over the course of the week. Next weeked is a break from soccer, so I'm hoping to run about 15km. I ran 14.5km last weekend, and then played my first soccer game the next day. Bad idea. Might have had something to do with the original leg strain.
I'm finding the distance running challenging. I did keep a good pace throughout the 14.5km run, though, clocking in at about 5:20/km. My aim was 5:30. Even when my legs felt jellyish, my feet kept up the pace.
My hope with the soccer is that I will get comfortable with the sprints, and this will add an element to my training that I'm not currently doing -- interval training. It could be an opportunity to get faster.
Or it could be an opportunity to get hurt. Yes, I feel my age these days. Sigh.
One final note: I'm not doing yoga right now!!! I really miss it, but there is no time to squeeze it in, unless I get up early one extra morning a week, which hasn't been feasible recently. With everyone in soccer, we're often not home and putting kids to be bed until after 9, at which point we still have supper cleanup, dishes, and laundry. I'm falling into bed around 10:30, utterly wiped, with no real downtime. It's felt relentless, honestly. It's a tough pace. Some mornings, therefore, I choose sleep.
Sunday, May 13, 2012
Mother's day run
I went for my first "distance" run this afternoon. It was a mere 12km, but that's far and away the furthest than I've run since my injury in January. And I did it in good time, too, and pain-free. So yay!
I would like to do a long run every weekend (working up gradually to about 28km, and then maintaining the weekend long run between 18-25km, never less than 15km). I'd only been planning to run 10km, but as soon as I got out on my old familiar 12km route, I just couldn't turn back. Turns out the route is actually 12.3km. I started slowly, and gradually kicked my pace up until I was running consistently at 5/km, sometimes faster, sometimes a few seconds slower. I ended 12km in 1:01, which made me pretty darn happy. I'm back, baby!
That's still off my best one-hour runs from last season, which were pushing 13km/hr, but nevertheless satisfying.
I was thinking that endurance training is really about teaching yourself how to breathe heavily for a long period of time. Next time I'm bringing water, however. I was definitely flirting with dehydration, given the heat. Had I known I was going 12km ...
Can't wait to keep on running. It just makes me so happy.
:::
Side note: I've signed up to play on a women's rec soccer team. The last time I was on a team was, oh, twenty-seven years ago. I kid you not. I've asked to play forward or midfield and they are thrilled, apparently being overloaded with defenders (my husband tells me that older teams are often overloaded with defenders, as the running gets harder). My skills are rusty, but I'm looking forward to the stop and go running -- should get some good sprint work in. Maybe it will make me faster!
I would like to do a long run every weekend (working up gradually to about 28km, and then maintaining the weekend long run between 18-25km, never less than 15km). I'd only been planning to run 10km, but as soon as I got out on my old familiar 12km route, I just couldn't turn back. Turns out the route is actually 12.3km. I started slowly, and gradually kicked my pace up until I was running consistently at 5/km, sometimes faster, sometimes a few seconds slower. I ended 12km in 1:01, which made me pretty darn happy. I'm back, baby!
That's still off my best one-hour runs from last season, which were pushing 13km/hr, but nevertheless satisfying.
I was thinking that endurance training is really about teaching yourself how to breathe heavily for a long period of time. Next time I'm bringing water, however. I was definitely flirting with dehydration, given the heat. Had I known I was going 12km ...
Can't wait to keep on running. It just makes me so happy.
:::
Side note: I've signed up to play on a women's rec soccer team. The last time I was on a team was, oh, twenty-seven years ago. I kid you not. I've asked to play forward or midfield and they are thrilled, apparently being overloaded with defenders (my husband tells me that older teams are often overloaded with defenders, as the running gets harder). My skills are rusty, but I'm looking forward to the stop and go running -- should get some good sprint work in. Maybe it will make me faster!
Thursday, April 19, 2012
Run, run, as fast as you can
Okay, now I know I'll never be the fastest runner around. So my pleasure derives purely from pushing my limits and seeing how fast and far I can go. It's personal. And weirdly happy-making.
On Tuesday, we had what could have been our last spin class, except it looks like it will be extended another four weeks. I'm happy to stay inside. I want it not to be cold before I get outside riding in the early morning. (I know, Nath, I just need to dress better! But I'm a cold-wimp on my bike. Or maybe just a wimp.) Anyway, started Tuesday with spin class.
In the afternoon, I led a little running club of neighbourhood kids (including two of my own) on a 3km training session. The pace was not blistering, but the kids were thrilled to have made it 3km. It took us 20:52 (or thereabouts). I was wearing my GPS watch which greatly added to everyone's pleasure. "How far now?" We also stopped and walked for one minute between kilometres. I must say, the pace was so easy it wasn't really like runinng, for me. But it was super-fun.
And then, about an hour later, I took my daughter to soccer practice. And I got to run again. Again, my GPS watch greatly added to the pleasure. I'm getting rather addicted to it. I decided to run 5km as quickly as I could manage. There was a stiff wind and the loop was hilly, but hey. That meant sometimes the wind was at my back, sometimes in my face; couldn't complain. For the first kilometre, I didn't push too hard. But as I went on, I started to see my /km time on the watch drop, until I was running fairly consistently at 13km/hr. I got it as high as 14 with the downhill, and tried to keep it better than 12 even on the uphills. My goal was to finish 5km in less than 24 minutes. And I did it! The last km was brutal, but I kept my feet turning over as quickly as I could. I even passed two cyclists (admittedly, they weren't going very fast, but they looked pretty surprised). My time was 23:54. And then I ran two more kilometres, just to make it an even 10 on the day, and finished 7km in 34:35. So the pace definitely slowed, but it also felt easy. I used the last 2km as a cool-down.
What I loved about the run was imagining training myself to run comfortably at the 4:40 pace. That would make 5:00 pace feel easy. And then I could conquer the marathon in 3:30! Of course, I was pushing to my limit to keep it going at that pace, but, still. My limit used to be 5/km. It's all in the training. Training myself to accept new normals. And I'll need to add endurance training in too.
The next morning, early, I ran another 7.7km, for a total of nearly 18km in just over twelve hours. See? Happy-making!
But I've neglected my strength exercises. Must add these back in. Start watching TV again? I need to do pair them with something because I find them so boring, it's next to impossible to motivate myself now that my hip feels fine. But I could easily slip backwards, and I know it, if I get neglectful.
On Tuesday, we had what could have been our last spin class, except it looks like it will be extended another four weeks. I'm happy to stay inside. I want it not to be cold before I get outside riding in the early morning. (I know, Nath, I just need to dress better! But I'm a cold-wimp on my bike. Or maybe just a wimp.) Anyway, started Tuesday with spin class.
In the afternoon, I led a little running club of neighbourhood kids (including two of my own) on a 3km training session. The pace was not blistering, but the kids were thrilled to have made it 3km. It took us 20:52 (or thereabouts). I was wearing my GPS watch which greatly added to everyone's pleasure. "How far now?" We also stopped and walked for one minute between kilometres. I must say, the pace was so easy it wasn't really like runinng, for me. But it was super-fun.
And then, about an hour later, I took my daughter to soccer practice. And I got to run again. Again, my GPS watch greatly added to the pleasure. I'm getting rather addicted to it. I decided to run 5km as quickly as I could manage. There was a stiff wind and the loop was hilly, but hey. That meant sometimes the wind was at my back, sometimes in my face; couldn't complain. For the first kilometre, I didn't push too hard. But as I went on, I started to see my /km time on the watch drop, until I was running fairly consistently at 13km/hr. I got it as high as 14 with the downhill, and tried to keep it better than 12 even on the uphills. My goal was to finish 5km in less than 24 minutes. And I did it! The last km was brutal, but I kept my feet turning over as quickly as I could. I even passed two cyclists (admittedly, they weren't going very fast, but they looked pretty surprised). My time was 23:54. And then I ran two more kilometres, just to make it an even 10 on the day, and finished 7km in 34:35. So the pace definitely slowed, but it also felt easy. I used the last 2km as a cool-down.
What I loved about the run was imagining training myself to run comfortably at the 4:40 pace. That would make 5:00 pace feel easy. And then I could conquer the marathon in 3:30! Of course, I was pushing to my limit to keep it going at that pace, but, still. My limit used to be 5/km. It's all in the training. Training myself to accept new normals. And I'll need to add endurance training in too.
The next morning, early, I ran another 7.7km, for a total of nearly 18km in just over twelve hours. See? Happy-making!
But I've neglected my strength exercises. Must add these back in. Start watching TV again? I need to do pair them with something because I find them so boring, it's next to impossible to motivate myself now that my hip feels fine. But I could easily slip backwards, and I know it, if I get neglectful.
Saturday, April 14, 2012
More running
How much have I run this week? I know it's more than I've run since January, and I'm happy about that. None of my runs have been longer than 9km, but that's okay. I'm working my way up slowly to the longer runs. I keep doing the shorter runs at a fast pace -- as fast as I can push it -- and I'm not sure I even remember how to do a long run anymore. I will have to moderate my efforts slightly when I add those back in. Waiting to get an okay from the dr before attempting any.
Meanwhile ...
From Sunday to Saturday: 4.5 + 6 + 9 + 6 + 8 = 33.5km
That's not quite at the 40km/week I was aiming for back at the beginning of the year, but it's getting closer. A few of those runs were done very much against what I was feeling like doing, but I just decided to take opportunities and go. In addition to the running, I also went to one spin class, one spin + kettlebell class, and one kundalini class. So mostly running, really. Running is my favourite thing to do, even though it's really hard. Today, I ran trails during my daughter's soccer practice. I tried to keep my pace at 12km/hour. Uphill my pace would fall off. Downhill it would amp up. I'm still lacking in endurance, but I managed to keep my pace consistent for 8km, which I completed in 40.42 minutes. That's off my hoped-for 10-km race pace by a bit ... but on the other hand, it wasn't a race, and it involved some very big hills. I find myself trying to run virtually every time as if I were in a race. I'm not sure how to turn off that part of myself. I actually enjoyed my Thursday evening run, in a slightly twisted way, because I wasn't in the mood to run so I just set the goal very low: just get out and run, for as long as I could stand it. I felt physically kind of miserable. My GPS watch was not working. So I just ran, without glancing to see my pace. I think that was good for me, mentally. Probably worked less hard, but also kind of enjoyed the laid-back-ness of it, and appreciated myself just for trying.
I've been really tired, however. Never fully felt awake this week. I hope it's a temporary energy lull.
Meanwhile ...
From Sunday to Saturday: 4.5 + 6 + 9 + 6 + 8 = 33.5km
That's not quite at the 40km/week I was aiming for back at the beginning of the year, but it's getting closer. A few of those runs were done very much against what I was feeling like doing, but I just decided to take opportunities and go. In addition to the running, I also went to one spin class, one spin + kettlebell class, and one kundalini class. So mostly running, really. Running is my favourite thing to do, even though it's really hard. Today, I ran trails during my daughter's soccer practice. I tried to keep my pace at 12km/hour. Uphill my pace would fall off. Downhill it would amp up. I'm still lacking in endurance, but I managed to keep my pace consistent for 8km, which I completed in 40.42 minutes. That's off my hoped-for 10-km race pace by a bit ... but on the other hand, it wasn't a race, and it involved some very big hills. I find myself trying to run virtually every time as if I were in a race. I'm not sure how to turn off that part of myself. I actually enjoyed my Thursday evening run, in a slightly twisted way, because I wasn't in the mood to run so I just set the goal very low: just get out and run, for as long as I could stand it. I felt physically kind of miserable. My GPS watch was not working. So I just ran, without glancing to see my pace. I think that was good for me, mentally. Probably worked less hard, but also kind of enjoyed the laid-back-ness of it, and appreciated myself just for trying.
I've been really tired, however. Never fully felt awake this week. I hope it's a temporary energy lull.
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
Up, Down, Up, Down
Okay, to begin, Friday to Tuesday record of exercise (since I missed posting earlier):
Friday: physio, strength exercises, 6.5km run
Saturday: strength exercises
Sunday: strength exercises, 7km run
Monday: swim 2800m
Tuesday: spin 1 hr, run 7km
Wednesday: run 7.5km, physio and strength exercises
Thursday: spin and kettlebell class, strength exercises
Friday: run 7.5km (34 minutes)
Saturday: played soccer with my kids
Sunday: 25 minute trail running within a 90 minute hike, strength exercises
Monday: NOTHING
Tuesday: spin 1 hr
:::
So here's the physio scoop. When I saw her last week on Wednesday, she gave me a small set of strengthening exercises to continue working on, almost all core exercises with one glute exercise too. And she said she wouldn't need to see me for a few weeks, so I arranged to see her before seeing the sports doctor, which is at the end of this month. She will do a running assessment at that time. When I asked about long, slow runs, she said they would be at a lower cadence. But down the road, as my fitness improves again, I might be running my long slow runs at a pretty fast cadence. It's all relative.
I had an awesome run on Friday afternoon. I kept getting faster with each passing kilometre, and my GPS watch was working. At each kilometre, the watch shows me how fast my pace was for the last kilometre. I did one kilometre lap in 4:38, which is fast for me. I felt no pain, just felt like it was really hard work. Really really hard to keep my feet moving at that quick cadence.
I don't feel in terrific shape. This morning's spin class felt tough, much tougher than it seemed it ought to. I think, however, that I was feeling the after-effects of the trail running I did on the weekend. I rolled my ankle several times on that run, and after the last time it really hurt. I probably should have iced it. It was very stiff yesterday, and is still fairly painful today. I was feeling it during spin, not agonizing pain or anything, just discomfort. But I was also feeling my calves on both legs. I must have been using them on the hike, perhaps more than I should have--seems like my glutes should have been working harder than my calves.
It's a new week, but I've got a kid home sick, and it doesn't feel like a new week yet. And I don't have that it's a new week energy either. Sometimes it's all about hanging in and getting through, and sticking with the plan. Haven't decided whether or not I should run this evening. But I definitely need to do my strength exercises. Definitely. I felt a bit lost without a weekly visit scheduled with my physio--I think that was keeping me honest re the exercises. Now I have to keep myself honest.
Have not been to yoga in way too long. Missed this Monday for an Easter dinner, and last Monday because we had a complicated food pickup. My body is missing that stretching, that's for sure.
Friday: physio, strength exercises, 6.5km run
Saturday: strength exercises
Sunday: strength exercises, 7km run
Monday: swim 2800m
Tuesday: spin 1 hr, run 7km
Wednesday: run 7.5km, physio and strength exercises
Thursday: spin and kettlebell class, strength exercises
Friday: run 7.5km (34 minutes)
Saturday: played soccer with my kids
Sunday: 25 minute trail running within a 90 minute hike, strength exercises
Monday: NOTHING
Tuesday: spin 1 hr
:::
So here's the physio scoop. When I saw her last week on Wednesday, she gave me a small set of strengthening exercises to continue working on, almost all core exercises with one glute exercise too. And she said she wouldn't need to see me for a few weeks, so I arranged to see her before seeing the sports doctor, which is at the end of this month. She will do a running assessment at that time. When I asked about long, slow runs, she said they would be at a lower cadence. But down the road, as my fitness improves again, I might be running my long slow runs at a pretty fast cadence. It's all relative.
I had an awesome run on Friday afternoon. I kept getting faster with each passing kilometre, and my GPS watch was working. At each kilometre, the watch shows me how fast my pace was for the last kilometre. I did one kilometre lap in 4:38, which is fast for me. I felt no pain, just felt like it was really hard work. Really really hard to keep my feet moving at that quick cadence.
I don't feel in terrific shape. This morning's spin class felt tough, much tougher than it seemed it ought to. I think, however, that I was feeling the after-effects of the trail running I did on the weekend. I rolled my ankle several times on that run, and after the last time it really hurt. I probably should have iced it. It was very stiff yesterday, and is still fairly painful today. I was feeling it during spin, not agonizing pain or anything, just discomfort. But I was also feeling my calves on both legs. I must have been using them on the hike, perhaps more than I should have--seems like my glutes should have been working harder than my calves.
It's a new week, but I've got a kid home sick, and it doesn't feel like a new week yet. And I don't have that it's a new week energy either. Sometimes it's all about hanging in and getting through, and sticking with the plan. Haven't decided whether or not I should run this evening. But I definitely need to do my strength exercises. Definitely. I felt a bit lost without a weekly visit scheduled with my physio--I think that was keeping me honest re the exercises. Now I have to keep myself honest.
Have not been to yoga in way too long. Missed this Monday for an Easter dinner, and last Monday because we had a complicated food pickup. My body is missing that stretching, that's for sure.
Friday, March 30, 2012
After this week's physio
First, to sum up my Friday to Friday work-outs:
Friday: physio/strength exercises; run, 30 mins/6km (pain-free!)
Saturday: NOTHING
Sunday: run, 31 mins/6km (pain-free); strength exercises
Monday: (got up early and went to pool only to discover it was temporarily closed due to chlorine issues; so no swim); hot yoga, 90 mins; strength exercises
Tuesday: spin, 1hr
Wednesday: run, 30 mins/5.3km (twinges of pain, so we kept it short); strength exercises (the extended version)
Thursday: spin/kettlebells; strength exercises (the quick version)
Friday: physio, exercises; run, 6.8km
That catches us up. I wish I knew how fast my pace was on today's run, but my GPS watch is unreliable, and this time it refused to work. And in fiddling around with it, I neglected to keep track even of how long I'd been running. It was a bit over thirty minutes, but not by much. I wanted to run because this morning, finally, my physio started working with me on cadence, which should help with my heel strike. Cadence is really beats per minute, and the ideal cadence for the average runner is 180 strides per minute. If you have a metronome (which we do), set it at 180 and practice running on the spot to get an idea of how quickly your feet should be striking the ground and rising up again. Elite marathoners run at closer to 220 or even higher. I found it a challenge today to keep that cadence up, but I also could tell it was forcing me to run differently -- with a more engaged core and glutes. I felt ZERO PAIN. And that's truly good news because today was the first I'd run in three weeks without being taped. And the first run I had with no pain was immediately after she'd taped my SI joint. This would seem to indicate several very positive things. 1. The strength work is paying off. 2. I can train a little harder. (I haven't cleared #2 with my doctor, however).
I need to talk to my physio to understand better how I can keep a 180 cadence on a long, slow training run. It seems counter-intuitive to imagine running more slowly while still striding fast, but perhaps the propulsive power in the stride would simply be reduced. I think those quick legs in spin class (which I generally dislike) are going to pay off. I tend to prefer the grindier, long-distance, slower and more powerful use of my leg muscles. I think this might be a core issue, however. I find the core exercises hard to do, mentally and physically. Clearly, they challenge me for a reason.
You know, it was a nice change today to actually begin to think about training toward longer distances again. Today, I also tried running during the day rather than at night or early in the morning. I'm trying to guage how disruptive that is to my writing cycle ... or whether it actually might help me focus more quickly when I actually sit down.
It's going to be hard to train myself back to the level of endurance I enjoyed before. It's probably a good thing that I have to take it relatively easy as I return to more running. Mentally, it's easier to consider going for a thirty minute run than a sixty minute run (let alone a multiple hour run!). I need to build toward those longer distances slowly -- not just physically, but mentally too. It takes a lot of time and commitment. And I'll admit that this recovery process has left me feeling weaker than I did before -- mentally as much as physically. I had this favourite phrase that would pop into my head on long runs, last year: "Indestructible" I would think to myself. I'm not sure why. It made me feel super-powerful rather than doubtful, even if I was feeling tired. I haven't let myself say that since the injury. I know I'm not indestructible. But the thing is, I knew I wasn't indestructible before either, and that didn't stop me from embracing the powerful feeling, or letting myself imagine my own strength in that way. I'm not sure how to get back to point of confidence. Confidence is a funny thing. It doesn't always relate to reality. I'm hardly weak right now, and I know that, but I don't feel it. I wasn't indestructible before, and I knew that, but I felt it anyway.
Curious, isn't it.
Friday: physio/strength exercises; run, 30 mins/6km (pain-free!)
Saturday: NOTHING
Sunday: run, 31 mins/6km (pain-free); strength exercises
Monday: (got up early and went to pool only to discover it was temporarily closed due to chlorine issues; so no swim); hot yoga, 90 mins; strength exercises
Tuesday: spin, 1hr
Wednesday: run, 30 mins/5.3km (twinges of pain, so we kept it short); strength exercises (the extended version)
Thursday: spin/kettlebells; strength exercises (the quick version)
Friday: physio, exercises; run, 6.8km
That catches us up. I wish I knew how fast my pace was on today's run, but my GPS watch is unreliable, and this time it refused to work. And in fiddling around with it, I neglected to keep track even of how long I'd been running. It was a bit over thirty minutes, but not by much. I wanted to run because this morning, finally, my physio started working with me on cadence, which should help with my heel strike. Cadence is really beats per minute, and the ideal cadence for the average runner is 180 strides per minute. If you have a metronome (which we do), set it at 180 and practice running on the spot to get an idea of how quickly your feet should be striking the ground and rising up again. Elite marathoners run at closer to 220 or even higher. I found it a challenge today to keep that cadence up, but I also could tell it was forcing me to run differently -- with a more engaged core and glutes. I felt ZERO PAIN. And that's truly good news because today was the first I'd run in three weeks without being taped. And the first run I had with no pain was immediately after she'd taped my SI joint. This would seem to indicate several very positive things. 1. The strength work is paying off. 2. I can train a little harder. (I haven't cleared #2 with my doctor, however).
I need to talk to my physio to understand better how I can keep a 180 cadence on a long, slow training run. It seems counter-intuitive to imagine running more slowly while still striding fast, but perhaps the propulsive power in the stride would simply be reduced. I think those quick legs in spin class (which I generally dislike) are going to pay off. I tend to prefer the grindier, long-distance, slower and more powerful use of my leg muscles. I think this might be a core issue, however. I find the core exercises hard to do, mentally and physically. Clearly, they challenge me for a reason.
You know, it was a nice change today to actually begin to think about training toward longer distances again. Today, I also tried running during the day rather than at night or early in the morning. I'm trying to guage how disruptive that is to my writing cycle ... or whether it actually might help me focus more quickly when I actually sit down.
It's going to be hard to train myself back to the level of endurance I enjoyed before. It's probably a good thing that I have to take it relatively easy as I return to more running. Mentally, it's easier to consider going for a thirty minute run than a sixty minute run (let alone a multiple hour run!). I need to build toward those longer distances slowly -- not just physically, but mentally too. It takes a lot of time and commitment. And I'll admit that this recovery process has left me feeling weaker than I did before -- mentally as much as physically. I had this favourite phrase that would pop into my head on long runs, last year: "Indestructible" I would think to myself. I'm not sure why. It made me feel super-powerful rather than doubtful, even if I was feeling tired. I haven't let myself say that since the injury. I know I'm not indestructible. But the thing is, I knew I wasn't indestructible before either, and that didn't stop me from embracing the powerful feeling, or letting myself imagine my own strength in that way. I'm not sure how to get back to point of confidence. Confidence is a funny thing. It doesn't always relate to reality. I'm hardly weak right now, and I know that, but I don't feel it. I wasn't indestructible before, and I knew that, but I felt it anyway.
Curious, isn't it.
Friday, March 23, 2012
Getting better, getting restless
I'm doing physio about once a week now. Today was the day. For the past two weeks, I've had my SI joint taped by the physio, and it's made my running pain-free. No exaggeration. But today she told me this would be the last week I'd have the joint taped. Starting next week, she wants me to run without it, so that my muscles will start doing the work on their own. I'm probably pretty naive, but I sort of thought this taping thing was going pretty well -- why not just tape forever? Apparently that's not how it works.
She worked me hard today, mostly with glute and core work.
I'm getting so much better that it feels like I should be returning to normal training. No, says my physio. Now is probably the time when I'm most at risk of re-injury, feeling just well enough to go too hard and cause quick regression. I must must must force myself to keep at the strengthening exercises, continue to spin/bike and swim, and run only in moderation. Never more than every other day. And not for much longer than 20 minutes at a time.
The arrival of warmth and sunshine does not help my resolve.
On Sunday I will have to post my first-ever DNF at a race I signed up for immediately after the marathon last fall -- a 30km course in nearby Hamilton. If I let myself think about it, it makes me sad, so I'm not letting myself think about it. Truthfully, these strength exercises are crazy hard and take a ton of discipline to do daily. I look as fit as ever, if not fitter, what with the resistance and core training. But I feel out of shape. I wonder whether -- when I get the go-ahead -- I'll have the discipline to train myself back to marathon-running. It took so much hard work to get there. Will I have the patience and resolve to train myself back again? Or will my interests have shifted in the meantime to some other mildly obsessive cause?
Can't remember when I last posted my daily work-outs, so I'll start with last Sunday:
Sunday: run 8km (fast/medium); strength exercises
Monday: swim (2700m); hot yoga, 90 min
Tuesday: spin (1 hour)
Wednesday: strength exercises (40 minutes)
Thursday: spin/weights; strength exercises
Friday: physio, strength/core work (40 minutes)
I plan to run tonight. I wanted to run another 8km, but my physio said no, that really shouldn't happen again, not yet. When I asked why, if I'm running pain-free, she said that was a tough question to answer, but the idea is that I won't know I've pushed too far until it's too late. If I do start to hurt, I've already gone too far. And I'm still running taped. So I'm running with a crutch, essentially, and until I'm running pain-free and on my own strength, with all the core imbalances resolved ... well, stick to short runs, fast is fine -- as long as it doesn't hurt. But short.
Hard advice to take.
She worked me hard today, mostly with glute and core work.
I'm getting so much better that it feels like I should be returning to normal training. No, says my physio. Now is probably the time when I'm most at risk of re-injury, feeling just well enough to go too hard and cause quick regression. I must must must force myself to keep at the strengthening exercises, continue to spin/bike and swim, and run only in moderation. Never more than every other day. And not for much longer than 20 minutes at a time.
The arrival of warmth and sunshine does not help my resolve.
On Sunday I will have to post my first-ever DNF at a race I signed up for immediately after the marathon last fall -- a 30km course in nearby Hamilton. If I let myself think about it, it makes me sad, so I'm not letting myself think about it. Truthfully, these strength exercises are crazy hard and take a ton of discipline to do daily. I look as fit as ever, if not fitter, what with the resistance and core training. But I feel out of shape. I wonder whether -- when I get the go-ahead -- I'll have the discipline to train myself back to marathon-running. It took so much hard work to get there. Will I have the patience and resolve to train myself back again? Or will my interests have shifted in the meantime to some other mildly obsessive cause?
Can't remember when I last posted my daily work-outs, so I'll start with last Sunday:
Sunday: run 8km (fast/medium); strength exercises
Monday: swim (2700m); hot yoga, 90 min
Tuesday: spin (1 hour)
Wednesday: strength exercises (40 minutes)
Thursday: spin/weights; strength exercises
Friday: physio, strength/core work (40 minutes)
I plan to run tonight. I wanted to run another 8km, but my physio said no, that really shouldn't happen again, not yet. When I asked why, if I'm running pain-free, she said that was a tough question to answer, but the idea is that I won't know I've pushed too far until it's too late. If I do start to hurt, I've already gone too far. And I'm still running taped. So I'm running with a crutch, essentially, and until I'm running pain-free and on my own strength, with all the core imbalances resolved ... well, stick to short runs, fast is fine -- as long as it doesn't hurt. But short.
Hard advice to take.
Sunday, March 18, 2012
Good good good
Sunday: Run (fast; 6km). Strength exercises.
Monday: Yoga (90 mins). Strength exercises.
Tuesday: Spin (1 hr). Strength exercises.
Wednesday: Run (slow; 40 mins).
Thursday: Spin/weights (45 mins). Strength exercises.
Friday: Physio (1 hr). Run (slow, with daughter, 3.6km). Strength exercises.
Saturday: Yoga (1 hr). Run (5.6km, medium). Half of my strength exercises.
Sunday: Run (7.9km, fast/medium).
My run today (Sunday) was longer than I've done in awhile. And I felt it. But what I didn't feel was injured. My physio has taped my SI joint on my left side, and I haven't had pain in my left leg since. I can also feel my glutes kicking in on my runs. Even my right leg hamstring/IT band pain did not flare today. All that flared was a feeling of being so unfit compared to just a few months ago! It was hard. But maybe I can add on a little more distance and a little more distance and gradually work my way back to real long-distance fitness. Will it be harder or easier to do it, having done it before? There isn't the same sense of discovery as the first time; but then again, there is a sense of yes, I can do this! I was just grateful I didn't hurt myself while running rather further than planned today.
Monday: Yoga (90 mins). Strength exercises.
Tuesday: Spin (1 hr). Strength exercises.
Wednesday: Run (slow; 40 mins).
Thursday: Spin/weights (45 mins). Strength exercises.
Friday: Physio (1 hr). Run (slow, with daughter, 3.6km). Strength exercises.
Saturday: Yoga (1 hr). Run (5.6km, medium). Half of my strength exercises.
Sunday: Run (7.9km, fast/medium).
My run today (Sunday) was longer than I've done in awhile. And I felt it. But what I didn't feel was injured. My physio has taped my SI joint on my left side, and I haven't had pain in my left leg since. I can also feel my glutes kicking in on my runs. Even my right leg hamstring/IT band pain did not flare today. All that flared was a feeling of being so unfit compared to just a few months ago! It was hard. But maybe I can add on a little more distance and a little more distance and gradually work my way back to real long-distance fitness. Will it be harder or easier to do it, having done it before? There isn't the same sense of discovery as the first time; but then again, there is a sense of yes, I can do this! I was just grateful I didn't hurt myself while running rather further than planned today.
Monday, March 12, 2012
Crazy weather, crazy body
I was just folding laundry and saw what a difference a few days makes in terms our crazy winter/spring weather here in Southern Ontario. On Friday night, it was bitterly cold and I wore a double layer of pants for my run. Less than 48 hours later, yesterday afternoon, I ran in cut-off pants and a t-shirt, and I was sweating and hot. And covered in mud by the end of the run.
Yes, I ran three times this past week, and all were "good" runs. Wednesday morning was the toughest slog, but it wasn't half-bad. Friday evening I felt really good despite the cold, and I didn't push the pace too hard, having discussed that problem of mine with my physio and my sports dr just that morning. But yesterday afternoon my legs felt so good that I did push the pace, and pushed and pushed it until I was running 4:30/km for the last two full kilometres. It was exhilerating, and challenging. My daughter rode her bike with me, and luckily she figured out quickly that mom wasn't interested in chatting. I ran 6km in 30 minutes exactly (and that includes the lights I had to wait for ... which really annoyed me). The entire run I kept thinking: I don't feel injured. I'll admit that had I gone much further, the twitch in my right hamstring/IT band would have started to twang much more loudly, but my left leg, which has been the source of all this pain this winter did not trouble me AT ALL. Thrilling! As long as I'm able, I'm going to keep treating these short runs as killer speed challenges. It makes me feel like I'm doing some worthwhile training even while recovering from injury.
This morning I woke up with incredible pain in a nerve in my back -- shoulder blade height, close to the spine. I'm panicking that this is something new and that I need go to back to my chiro, whom I haven't seen for about eight months. I can't afford to go to the chiro as often as he wanted me to, so I gave it up altogether. I hate being lectured. Now I'm wondering .... what to do? If I tried a new chiro, I'd have to pay for the initial assessment before getting treatment. And I already have this VERY EXPENSIVE physio hobby right now. I'll see her on Friday morning. Maybe she'll have thoughts. I don't want to let it go too long because the pain is fairly intense. I'm trying stretching and ice, and will attempt yoga tonight.
Here's what I did last week:
Monday: swim (2500m); physio, strength exercises
Tuesday: spin (1 hr); strength exercises
Wedneday: run (40 mins., slow)
Thursday: strength exercises
Friday: run (30 mins, medium); strength exercises
Saturday: NOTHING! OH NO!
Sunday: run (30 mins, fast); strength exercises, plus some extra yoga @ home to make up for Saturday's slacking off (in my defense, I was distracted by my book being reviewed positively in the Globe and Mail, plus I baked bread, plus my husband and I had the house to ourselves overnight because our children were away on a babysitting exchange ... too much celebrating = no exercise)
Yes, I ran three times this past week, and all were "good" runs. Wednesday morning was the toughest slog, but it wasn't half-bad. Friday evening I felt really good despite the cold, and I didn't push the pace too hard, having discussed that problem of mine with my physio and my sports dr just that morning. But yesterday afternoon my legs felt so good that I did push the pace, and pushed and pushed it until I was running 4:30/km for the last two full kilometres. It was exhilerating, and challenging. My daughter rode her bike with me, and luckily she figured out quickly that mom wasn't interested in chatting. I ran 6km in 30 minutes exactly (and that includes the lights I had to wait for ... which really annoyed me). The entire run I kept thinking: I don't feel injured. I'll admit that had I gone much further, the twitch in my right hamstring/IT band would have started to twang much more loudly, but my left leg, which has been the source of all this pain this winter did not trouble me AT ALL. Thrilling! As long as I'm able, I'm going to keep treating these short runs as killer speed challenges. It makes me feel like I'm doing some worthwhile training even while recovering from injury.
This morning I woke up with incredible pain in a nerve in my back -- shoulder blade height, close to the spine. I'm panicking that this is something new and that I need go to back to my chiro, whom I haven't seen for about eight months. I can't afford to go to the chiro as often as he wanted me to, so I gave it up altogether. I hate being lectured. Now I'm wondering .... what to do? If I tried a new chiro, I'd have to pay for the initial assessment before getting treatment. And I already have this VERY EXPENSIVE physio hobby right now. I'll see her on Friday morning. Maybe she'll have thoughts. I don't want to let it go too long because the pain is fairly intense. I'm trying stretching and ice, and will attempt yoga tonight.
Here's what I did last week:
Monday: swim (2500m); physio, strength exercises
Tuesday: spin (1 hr); strength exercises
Wedneday: run (40 mins., slow)
Thursday: strength exercises
Friday: run (30 mins, medium); strength exercises
Saturday: NOTHING! OH NO!
Sunday: run (30 mins, fast); strength exercises, plus some extra yoga @ home to make up for Saturday's slacking off (in my defense, I was distracted by my book being reviewed positively in the Globe and Mail, plus I baked bread, plus my husband and I had the house to ourselves overnight because our children were away on a babysitting exchange ... too much celebrating = no exercise)
Monday, March 5, 2012
Exercise every day
Yay! The new mantra is working. I am exercising every day. It helps that I have to do about twenty-thirty minutes of strengthening exercises for physio every day, so on busy days that might be all I manage. But at least I'm managing that. Must retrain these muscles!
Here was my last week, in exercise:
Monday: swim, 2500m (slow!); physio, strength exercises
Tuesday: spin, 1hr; strength exercises
Wednesday: run, 40 minutes (slow!)
Thursday: spin/weights, 45 minutes; strength exercises
Friday: physio, strength exercises; run, 30 minutes (fast!)
Saturday: strength exercises
Sunday: run, 30 minutes (slow!); strength exercises
No yoga. And I crave more cardio, without a doubt. But as I thought this morning, coming down the stairs in the dark at 5am, I'm doing something. And something is better than nothing. Last year, training was easier, mentally, because I kept seeing improvements. I got stronger, faster, could swim further. This year I have been unable even to maintain my peak fitness from last year, let alone build on it. I've gotten, frankly, slower and in some areas weaker (though certain muscle groups are a heck of a lot stronger, which is nice). That's frustrating. And I think it takes more guts to keep at it when you don't see improvement. But I'm trying. I'm doing my best. I'm showing up. And that's all I ask of myself. Keep showing up, Carrie, keep showing up!
Here was my last week, in exercise:
Monday: swim, 2500m (slow!); physio, strength exercises
Tuesday: spin, 1hr; strength exercises
Wednesday: run, 40 minutes (slow!)
Thursday: spin/weights, 45 minutes; strength exercises
Friday: physio, strength exercises; run, 30 minutes (fast!)
Saturday: strength exercises
Sunday: run, 30 minutes (slow!); strength exercises
No yoga. And I crave more cardio, without a doubt. But as I thought this morning, coming down the stairs in the dark at 5am, I'm doing something. And something is better than nothing. Last year, training was easier, mentally, because I kept seeing improvements. I got stronger, faster, could swim further. This year I have been unable even to maintain my peak fitness from last year, let alone build on it. I've gotten, frankly, slower and in some areas weaker (though certain muscle groups are a heck of a lot stronger, which is nice). That's frustrating. And I think it takes more guts to keep at it when you don't see improvement. But I'm trying. I'm doing my best. I'm showing up. And that's all I ask of myself. Keep showing up, Carrie, keep showing up!
Monday, February 27, 2012
A new mantra
I'm working with a new mantra. "Exercise every day." It's helping to keep me motivated. Last year I had all those races to motivate me, but this year, so far, with the injury, I won't be racing for the near future at least, and perhaps for a few months ... and who knows when I can sign up for the longer races I'd really like to be doing. (I am signed on for the Toad, but that's not til the end of September, and I remain optimistic about being fit to train over the summer for that one.)
Anyway, in the absence of races, I need another reason to get out of bed.
Exercise every day seems to be working well.
Ideally, I'd like to keep track of what exercise I'm doing every day, that hope to get on this blog more often to note that down. But practically speaking, my other life -- as a writer launching a new book -- has taken over, and I'm finding it difficult to find time to post here too.
Here goes (only going back as far as I can remember):
Feb. 18 - yoga, 60 minutes
Feb. 19 - run (slow), 21 minutes (Bechtel)
Feb. 20 - yoga with family, 60 minutes; strength exercises 15 minutes
Feb. 21 - spin, 60 minutes
Feb. 22 - run (slow), 40 minutes; strength exercises 25 minutes; plus exercises with physio, 30 minutes
Feb. 23 - spin/weights, 45 minutes; strength exercises 25 minutes
Feb. 24 - yoga, 60 minutes; strength exercises 25 minutes
Feb. 25 - run, 23 minutes (Wloo Park); strength exercises 25 minutes
Feb. 26 - run, 23 minutes, as fast as I could go, plus hills (Bechtel)
Feb. 27 - swim, 2500m; exercises with physio, 30 minutes
:::
And that's up to date. I hope to post here once a week as a way to keep myself honest. I'm trying really hard to keep doing the strength exercises every day. And honestly, I'm already noticing a big difference in my glutes. I was able to run hard up the hills yesterday. That seemed to be almost easier than running on the flat, probably because my glutes engage automatically going uphill -- and that's how I should be running all the time. My physio strongly recommends that I not consciously try to change my stride, lest I injury myself in the process of trying to force change. She says all of this strength work will get me where I need to go, and will change my stride naturally. Here's hoping.
My cardio fitness has really dropped off, and I'm finding that frustrating. Just 20 minutes of hard running yesterday had me feeling very fatigued. And my swim this morning was a challenge. So slow! Because I know what hard work it takes to get well-conditioned for distances and speed (running, specifically), I'm sort of dreading all the base work that will need to be done in order to get myself back up to marathon fitness again. It's going to be hard!
No, it's going to be a challenge. And I don't mind being challenged. Not at all.
Anyway, in the absence of races, I need another reason to get out of bed.
Exercise every day seems to be working well.
Ideally, I'd like to keep track of what exercise I'm doing every day, that hope to get on this blog more often to note that down. But practically speaking, my other life -- as a writer launching a new book -- has taken over, and I'm finding it difficult to find time to post here too.
Here goes (only going back as far as I can remember):
Feb. 18 - yoga, 60 minutes
Feb. 19 - run (slow), 21 minutes (Bechtel)
Feb. 20 - yoga with family, 60 minutes; strength exercises 15 minutes
Feb. 21 - spin, 60 minutes
Feb. 22 - run (slow), 40 minutes; strength exercises 25 minutes; plus exercises with physio, 30 minutes
Feb. 23 - spin/weights, 45 minutes; strength exercises 25 minutes
Feb. 24 - yoga, 60 minutes; strength exercises 25 minutes
Feb. 25 - run, 23 minutes (Wloo Park); strength exercises 25 minutes
Feb. 26 - run, 23 minutes, as fast as I could go, plus hills (Bechtel)
Feb. 27 - swim, 2500m; exercises with physio, 30 minutes
:::
And that's up to date. I hope to post here once a week as a way to keep myself honest. I'm trying really hard to keep doing the strength exercises every day. And honestly, I'm already noticing a big difference in my glutes. I was able to run hard up the hills yesterday. That seemed to be almost easier than running on the flat, probably because my glutes engage automatically going uphill -- and that's how I should be running all the time. My physio strongly recommends that I not consciously try to change my stride, lest I injury myself in the process of trying to force change. She says all of this strength work will get me where I need to go, and will change my stride naturally. Here's hoping.
My cardio fitness has really dropped off, and I'm finding that frustrating. Just 20 minutes of hard running yesterday had me feeling very fatigued. And my swim this morning was a challenge. So slow! Because I know what hard work it takes to get well-conditioned for distances and speed (running, specifically), I'm sort of dreading all the base work that will need to be done in order to get myself back up to marathon fitness again. It's going to be hard!
No, it's going to be a challenge. And I don't mind being challenged. Not at all.
Sunday, February 12, 2012
A good week
This past week turned out to be a good one. I've done some exercise every day, including a run on Thursday evening. The sports doctor cleared me to run 10-15 minutes 3x a week. It's not much, but it's something. I felt good and strong and would have kept going, but I'm trying very hard to follow the recommendations and speed recovery. I was definitely in a little more pain the next morning, but nothing compared to what it was.
No stress fracture, so I'm cleared on that front. And I start physio tomorrow morning.
Planning a second run this afternoon, again no more than 15 minutes. But that's okay! It's something.
I enjoyed the spin/weight class on Thursday morning and signed up for the next three. I also signed up for a kundalini yoga class starting in April. Core work! I know I need it. And then hopefully the endurance and the ability to train for endurance will flow from that.
Unfortuantely I cannot withdraw from the 30km race (no refunds), which I will not be able to complete. I could go and walk the course instead, but I don't think I want to do that. I'm just going to accept a did-not-finish, and know that it's part of the journey. I wonder how quickly I will heal and whether I'll be able to get back to training for longer distances. The crazy thought in my head as I ran those ten minutes on Thursday evening was: I'm totally going to do an ultramarathon.
Heh. Baby steps. Have to get back to 5km distances first. Sigh. However, I will say that I did not feel out of shape in the least. I'm sure I could have gone 8-10km without any problem (other than the problem of potentially re-injuring myself). But I felt very strong, and have felt nice and strong all week during the various exercise activities.
No stress fracture, so I'm cleared on that front. And I start physio tomorrow morning.
Planning a second run this afternoon, again no more than 15 minutes. But that's okay! It's something.
I enjoyed the spin/weight class on Thursday morning and signed up for the next three. I also signed up for a kundalini yoga class starting in April. Core work! I know I need it. And then hopefully the endurance and the ability to train for endurance will flow from that.
Unfortuantely I cannot withdraw from the 30km race (no refunds), which I will not be able to complete. I could go and walk the course instead, but I don't think I want to do that. I'm just going to accept a did-not-finish, and know that it's part of the journey. I wonder how quickly I will heal and whether I'll be able to get back to training for longer distances. The crazy thought in my head as I ran those ten minutes on Thursday evening was: I'm totally going to do an ultramarathon.
Heh. Baby steps. Have to get back to 5km distances first. Sigh. However, I will say that I did not feel out of shape in the least. I'm sure I could have gone 8-10km without any problem (other than the problem of potentially re-injuring myself). But I felt very strong, and have felt nice and strong all week during the various exercise activities.
Wednesday, February 8, 2012
This week's work
This afternoon I'll be seeing the sports dr for the follow-up on the last test (the bone scan). I can't help but think that the results will be good, because I'm almost certain my family dr (who also received the results) would have contacted me if he'd had concern. But. Won't know for sure until this afternoon.
Depending on the results, I hope to have a better idea of when I might be able to return to running. Or perhaps more precisely how.
Meantime, I've been plugging away at the alternatives available to me, and feeling pretty good about it on the whole.
- I went for a 6km walk on Friday night. Unfortunately, I wore my heavy winter boots which apparently were not fully broken in, because by 3km they were causing blistering on my heels. And then I had walk all the way back again. Ouch. Next time I will wear my running shoes, regardless of the weather.
- Hot yoga class on Saturday afternoon. I can go to that class now that I'm not doing my long runs. It felt too easy, but there are some good elements to it; some stretching, some strength-work.
- Went for a short walk on Sunday afternoon. It was a beautiful sunny day, and in fact the forest trails were deep with mud. I wore my rainboots, the only footwear that didn't chafe the blisters (still wearing them, actually). I only went about 2km; mostly took photos and just enjoyed being outside. I also ran about 100m without pain, but then the pain started up again ... but those 100m were 100m of pure bliss. Reminded me what I'm waiting for. I hope I'll remember and appreciate the joy when the opportunity to run comes again.
- Tried to swim on Monday morning, but there was a problem with the chlorine which the early-morning lifeguards couldn't fix. Went home and straight back to bed. That made Monday's evening's hot yoga class feel easier than usual. Lots of downward dog flows which really work the core and upper body. I felt strong and at ease. Nice.
- Spin class yesterday morning. My legs were going super-fast. I felt strong throughout. Maybe my body likes resting.
- Swim this morning. 2500m. I did the first 2000m in 42 minutes, or slightly less. But I was tired by that point. I finished the last 500m on principle only and did not push myself too hard, just swam it out. Slowly. That last 500m took me 12 minutes. I aim for 10, and probably do most splits in about 10.5. My goal is get faster and finish my 2000m in under forty minutes. Which would still be slow, but would show some improvement. I haven't really gotten any faster in the last six months. All I seem able to do is improve endurance rather than speed. I just swim, however. Well, I guess that's basically how I trained when I ran, too. I just ran--as fast and as far as I could.
- Tomorrow morning I am going to try out a spin/strength class at a facility I've never been to before. It's not too far from my house. The price is comparable to the spin class I'm currently taking BUT it's only 45 minutes, which sounds short. I'm doing a free trial. We shall see.
- Also doing a free trial at a different gym on Friday morning. This is especially short, only half an hour, but it's a strength class. I've never done strength or resistance training, and my sense is that's where I'm headed with this injury -- working to create balance in the muscle groups, stability in my core. This gym is very nearby, which is why I'm trying it, though all of its classes are short, no more than half an hour. I could do strength/resistance training on my own -- my husband is a kin and he has weights and exercise ideas and etc. -- but would I? Would I really go to the basement and work out by myself? Would I push myself? My sense is: no. Not for the static work. I need the motivation of a group and a leader.
Next week I'd like to try out the new Y. They also offer a free trial. They have early morning classes, but these only run for 45 minutes. Still, the monthly general membership is relatively inexpensive. It seems worth checking out.
I'm juggling a lot of factors, like price, location, and the appropriateness of the classes offered -- do they fit with my goals? Kind of interesting, actually. I'm interested to see where this all leads.
Depending on the results, I hope to have a better idea of when I might be able to return to running. Or perhaps more precisely how.
Meantime, I've been plugging away at the alternatives available to me, and feeling pretty good about it on the whole.
- I went for a 6km walk on Friday night. Unfortunately, I wore my heavy winter boots which apparently were not fully broken in, because by 3km they were causing blistering on my heels. And then I had walk all the way back again. Ouch. Next time I will wear my running shoes, regardless of the weather.
- Hot yoga class on Saturday afternoon. I can go to that class now that I'm not doing my long runs. It felt too easy, but there are some good elements to it; some stretching, some strength-work.
- Went for a short walk on Sunday afternoon. It was a beautiful sunny day, and in fact the forest trails were deep with mud. I wore my rainboots, the only footwear that didn't chafe the blisters (still wearing them, actually). I only went about 2km; mostly took photos and just enjoyed being outside. I also ran about 100m without pain, but then the pain started up again ... but those 100m were 100m of pure bliss. Reminded me what I'm waiting for. I hope I'll remember and appreciate the joy when the opportunity to run comes again.
- Tried to swim on Monday morning, but there was a problem with the chlorine which the early-morning lifeguards couldn't fix. Went home and straight back to bed. That made Monday's evening's hot yoga class feel easier than usual. Lots of downward dog flows which really work the core and upper body. I felt strong and at ease. Nice.
- Spin class yesterday morning. My legs were going super-fast. I felt strong throughout. Maybe my body likes resting.
- Swim this morning. 2500m. I did the first 2000m in 42 minutes, or slightly less. But I was tired by that point. I finished the last 500m on principle only and did not push myself too hard, just swam it out. Slowly. That last 500m took me 12 minutes. I aim for 10, and probably do most splits in about 10.5. My goal is get faster and finish my 2000m in under forty minutes. Which would still be slow, but would show some improvement. I haven't really gotten any faster in the last six months. All I seem able to do is improve endurance rather than speed. I just swim, however. Well, I guess that's basically how I trained when I ran, too. I just ran--as fast and as far as I could.
- Tomorrow morning I am going to try out a spin/strength class at a facility I've never been to before. It's not too far from my house. The price is comparable to the spin class I'm currently taking BUT it's only 45 minutes, which sounds short. I'm doing a free trial. We shall see.
- Also doing a free trial at a different gym on Friday morning. This is especially short, only half an hour, but it's a strength class. I've never done strength or resistance training, and my sense is that's where I'm headed with this injury -- working to create balance in the muscle groups, stability in my core. This gym is very nearby, which is why I'm trying it, though all of its classes are short, no more than half an hour. I could do strength/resistance training on my own -- my husband is a kin and he has weights and exercise ideas and etc. -- but would I? Would I really go to the basement and work out by myself? Would I push myself? My sense is: no. Not for the static work. I need the motivation of a group and a leader.
Next week I'd like to try out the new Y. They also offer a free trial. They have early morning classes, but these only run for 45 minutes. Still, the monthly general membership is relatively inexpensive. It seems worth checking out.
I'm juggling a lot of factors, like price, location, and the appropriateness of the classes offered -- do they fit with my goals? Kind of interesting, actually. I'm interested to see where this all leads.
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
Testing, testing
Well, January has not gone as anticipated. I'm certainly not running 40km a week as planned. I'm not running, period. On Friday I got an xray on my hips and yesterday saw the sports dr for results, which were good: no signs of arthritis and no visible stress fracture. Except then the dr told me that xrays only show approximately 10% of stress fractures anyway. But it was good news about the arthritis, plus some other malformation that can occur in the socket, and which I did not have.
So the next step is a bone scan. Which I had today. It involved being injected with radioactive dye (seriously?!), going home and waiting three hours, and then returning to be photographed. It also involved having the giant camera pressed nearly against me and I had a slightly claustrophobic reaction when it was an inch from my nose--similar to being inside a CT scan tube. They took a scan of my entire spine, and then extra scans of my hips and shins.
The sports doctor is on holiday until the middle of next week, but the good news is that my family doc will get results by tomorrow morning, so hopefully I will know more then. There may be an additional MRI before treatment begins. I guess they have to make a diagnosis before starting treatment. I did not ask what treatment for a stress fracture would be ... though he did say I wouldn't start physio right away if it is a stress fracture. But meantime I've been given the go-ahead to do exercise than doesn't cause me pain.
Spin seems fine. Swimming has been good. Yoga fine too. Walking causes some pain. Running is impossible. I can't even take two strides. I actually had a little moment while under the machine, and started to tear up as I thought about some really wonderful running moments in the past year, particularly in the marathon which is freshest in my mind. Just that sense of freedom and delight that I had while running that race. I miss that.
But I'm adjusting meantime to this new reality, and hoping and praying that it's temporary. If I do return to running, I think I will train a bit differently. I think I will attempt to work other muscle groups, maybe do some strength training specifically for runners, and definitely stretch more. I didn't stretch enough after spin today, due to racing from spin directly to the hospital, and I really need to add that into my every day routine, and make time for it.
So the next step is a bone scan. Which I had today. It involved being injected with radioactive dye (seriously?!), going home and waiting three hours, and then returning to be photographed. It also involved having the giant camera pressed nearly against me and I had a slightly claustrophobic reaction when it was an inch from my nose--similar to being inside a CT scan tube. They took a scan of my entire spine, and then extra scans of my hips and shins.
The sports doctor is on holiday until the middle of next week, but the good news is that my family doc will get results by tomorrow morning, so hopefully I will know more then. There may be an additional MRI before treatment begins. I guess they have to make a diagnosis before starting treatment. I did not ask what treatment for a stress fracture would be ... though he did say I wouldn't start physio right away if it is a stress fracture. But meantime I've been given the go-ahead to do exercise than doesn't cause me pain.
Spin seems fine. Swimming has been good. Yoga fine too. Walking causes some pain. Running is impossible. I can't even take two strides. I actually had a little moment while under the machine, and started to tear up as I thought about some really wonderful running moments in the past year, particularly in the marathon which is freshest in my mind. Just that sense of freedom and delight that I had while running that race. I miss that.
But I'm adjusting meantime to this new reality, and hoping and praying that it's temporary. If I do return to running, I think I will train a bit differently. I think I will attempt to work other muscle groups, maybe do some strength training specifically for runners, and definitely stretch more. I didn't stretch enough after spin today, due to racing from spin directly to the hospital, and I really need to add that into my every day routine, and make time for it.
Friday, January 20, 2012
Ah, the new year
I'm sitting here with a requisition form for an xray, and a referral to a sports medicine doctor. Sigh. I went to see my family doctor yesterday, and while it was heady to be assessed as an endurance runner, this hasn't been a happy week for the runner in me. The xray is to rule out a stress fracture in my hip, and the sports medicine doctor is to follow up, figure out where the pain is coming from, and get it treated and fixed. So I can run again.
Because I can't run. Well, it is strongly recommended that I not run for right now. I can barely stand to type those words. Wow. I could feel my stress level rising as I typed that sentence out. Not run? For how long? I don't know. It depends, of course. It depends on what's causing the pain and on how quickly I heal. The idea is that I should be running pain-free. Pain-free as in free from pain that tells me I should be stopping as opposed to pain that's ... well, different, I guess. I've gotten so used to running with some degree of pain or discomfort that I really am not sure I can tell the difference.
Except that I can. I did my long run on Saturday, ran 15.5km, and felt pain the entire time. By the end, the pain reminded me of how it feels to run a long distance; it does hurt to run a long way, although I wouldn't consider 15km a long way. What didn't seem right was that the pain was constant throughout. I hurt from the first step to the last and never loosened up in between.
Sitting seems to exacerbate the pain. Spinning didn't hurt at all. Swimming did, at least past a certain distance. Some yoga poses hurt, but I was able to go this morning and get through an hour without pain. But running is my rock. Running is my happy place. Running can be done anytime, anywhere. I could be running tonight during my daughter's soccer practice. I should be running tonight!
Definitely, I'm feeling frustrated. I'm relieved that this is happening now and not a year ago, when it might have derailed my burgeoning attempts to become someone who could complete triathlons and long-distance runs. Thankfully, I know I can. But I'm still frustrated. Wasn't this going to be a year devoted to running? You know, it could still be. I shouldn't get so down. A week, two weeks, even three or four weeks isn't going to get me too far off the training track. I could add an extra spin class, perhaps. I could get up early every morning and do yoga and find that inner strength again. Maybe that's exactly what my body/mind is lacking. This fitness journey isn't all about racing or times or getting faster or going further.
Why do I want to be fit? What am I afraid of as I face this time without running?
It was really hard to get up this morning; if my husband hadn't encouraged me to go, saying, "I know you'll feel better about yourself if you do," I would have turned off my alarm and gone back to sleep. I've noticed in myself all week a weakness of will, a mild depression, perhaps, when it comes to exercise. It's hard to get up early. But it shouldn't be any harder than it's been for the last year, should it? I'm a goal-oriented person. Maybe I need to reset my goals. Configure them to fit with my present situation. Accept that running can't be part of the equation--perhaps for a very short amount of time, who knows? Why not think positively? It's not forever. But I still need to accept that today I won't be running. Tomorrow I won't be running.
There are other outlets available. I did feel better--about myself--after going to yoga. I felt momentarily accepting, momentarily okay. I felt grateful that my body is still strong. I am still able to exercise in a variety of ways. I'm grateful for that.
Because I can't run. Well, it is strongly recommended that I not run for right now. I can barely stand to type those words. Wow. I could feel my stress level rising as I typed that sentence out. Not run? For how long? I don't know. It depends, of course. It depends on what's causing the pain and on how quickly I heal. The idea is that I should be running pain-free. Pain-free as in free from pain that tells me I should be stopping as opposed to pain that's ... well, different, I guess. I've gotten so used to running with some degree of pain or discomfort that I really am not sure I can tell the difference.
Except that I can. I did my long run on Saturday, ran 15.5km, and felt pain the entire time. By the end, the pain reminded me of how it feels to run a long distance; it does hurt to run a long way, although I wouldn't consider 15km a long way. What didn't seem right was that the pain was constant throughout. I hurt from the first step to the last and never loosened up in between.
Sitting seems to exacerbate the pain. Spinning didn't hurt at all. Swimming did, at least past a certain distance. Some yoga poses hurt, but I was able to go this morning and get through an hour without pain. But running is my rock. Running is my happy place. Running can be done anytime, anywhere. I could be running tonight during my daughter's soccer practice. I should be running tonight!
Definitely, I'm feeling frustrated. I'm relieved that this is happening now and not a year ago, when it might have derailed my burgeoning attempts to become someone who could complete triathlons and long-distance runs. Thankfully, I know I can. But I'm still frustrated. Wasn't this going to be a year devoted to running? You know, it could still be. I shouldn't get so down. A week, two weeks, even three or four weeks isn't going to get me too far off the training track. I could add an extra spin class, perhaps. I could get up early every morning and do yoga and find that inner strength again. Maybe that's exactly what my body/mind is lacking. This fitness journey isn't all about racing or times or getting faster or going further.
Why do I want to be fit? What am I afraid of as I face this time without running?
It was really hard to get up this morning; if my husband hadn't encouraged me to go, saying, "I know you'll feel better about yourself if you do," I would have turned off my alarm and gone back to sleep. I've noticed in myself all week a weakness of will, a mild depression, perhaps, when it comes to exercise. It's hard to get up early. But it shouldn't be any harder than it's been for the last year, should it? I'm a goal-oriented person. Maybe I need to reset my goals. Configure them to fit with my present situation. Accept that running can't be part of the equation--perhaps for a very short amount of time, who knows? Why not think positively? It's not forever. But I still need to accept that today I won't be running. Tomorrow I won't be running.
There are other outlets available. I did feel better--about myself--after going to yoga. I felt momentarily accepting, momentarily okay. I felt grateful that my body is still strong. I am still able to exercise in a variety of ways. I'm grateful for that.
Friday, January 13, 2012
Up, down
So I went ten days without stopping. But that might have been a mistake. My muscles were so sore andmy hips were creaking like a pair of rusty hinges. Yesterday, I would have gotten up to swim nevertheless, but Kevin had to leave for work very early. This morning nothing was stopping me. Except for me. And the desire to sleep.
So I did that instead.
There's a window for a run tonight during my daughter's soccer practice. It will mean going fairly late (7:30) and in the dark and snowy cold, but I might just take it. I'll go slowly. What's bugging me more than anything is how slowly I have to run. Everytime I push it, I pay for it. More pain. What also worries me is that I was in a good deal more pain following that long run--which really wasn't very long (15.5km). I'm not sure what this says about doing long runs. I'm due for my next tomorrow and had hoped to lengthen the distance by about 2km.
On the whole, I think this is a new year's effect. Setting improbable goals, then checking in with what's really going to work. Those ten days were a good start to the year and I'm glad I pushed and did them, but I think what they reminded me is that I do need breaks. And my body has its limits. I need to figure out how to train smart.
So I did that instead.
There's a window for a run tonight during my daughter's soccer practice. It will mean going fairly late (7:30) and in the dark and snowy cold, but I might just take it. I'll go slowly. What's bugging me more than anything is how slowly I have to run. Everytime I push it, I pay for it. More pain. What also worries me is that I was in a good deal more pain following that long run--which really wasn't very long (15.5km). I'm not sure what this says about doing long runs. I'm due for my next tomorrow and had hoped to lengthen the distance by about 2km.
On the whole, I think this is a new year's effect. Setting improbable goals, then checking in with what's really going to work. Those ten days were a good start to the year and I'm glad I pushed and did them, but I think what they reminded me is that I do need breaks. And my body has its limits. I need to figure out how to train smart.
Monday, January 9, 2012
Week past, week ahead
Last week: three runs (total of 40+km); two swims (total of 5500km); one yoga class; on spin class. Sounds like not much, but adds up to something every day and no days off. Hm. Can I keep up the pace?
This week I started with a swim this morning, and went 2700m. I would have gone the full 3000, but ran out of time. My husband and daughter (and sometimes my son) swim after I do, but need to get there and back in time for breakfast and school. I was off my pace of last Thursday anyway, by about two minutes. It would have taken me 64 minutes to complete 3000m, which is going the wrong direction as far as I'm concerned. I did not feel tired enough by 2700m; that's not bragging. I suspect I was swimming lazily, and not using the techniques learned last summer, which use different muscles and more breathing power. In any case, I was going pretty slowly.
Yoga tonight. I let my husband go to yoga yesterday morning instead of going myself. We are struggling to find time, both of us, for the things we want to do, because we often have to do them when the other is home with the kids. We're going to take turns on Sunday morning yoga.
Otherwise, this week looks like a usual week, hopefully much like last week. Here's hoping I keep up that Thursday morning swim. Despite swimming more slowly, I felt more comfortable in the water more quickly due to last Thursday's swim.
Instead of rest days, I'm trying to consider anything over 24 hours a bit of a rest, ie. running the long run on Saturday afternoon, and the previous work out being early Friday morning.
This week I started with a swim this morning, and went 2700m. I would have gone the full 3000, but ran out of time. My husband and daughter (and sometimes my son) swim after I do, but need to get there and back in time for breakfast and school. I was off my pace of last Thursday anyway, by about two minutes. It would have taken me 64 minutes to complete 3000m, which is going the wrong direction as far as I'm concerned. I did not feel tired enough by 2700m; that's not bragging. I suspect I was swimming lazily, and not using the techniques learned last summer, which use different muscles and more breathing power. In any case, I was going pretty slowly.
Yoga tonight. I let my husband go to yoga yesterday morning instead of going myself. We are struggling to find time, both of us, for the things we want to do, because we often have to do them when the other is home with the kids. We're going to take turns on Sunday morning yoga.
Otherwise, this week looks like a usual week, hopefully much like last week. Here's hoping I keep up that Thursday morning swim. Despite swimming more slowly, I felt more comfortable in the water more quickly due to last Thursday's swim.
Instead of rest days, I'm trying to consider anything over 24 hours a bit of a rest, ie. running the long run on Saturday afternoon, and the previous work out being early Friday morning.
Saturday, January 7, 2012
Long run, new year
Well, this first week of the new year is going just great. I've figured out how to fit in a long run. It will have to happen on Saturdays, and will be arranged around the girls' soccer. Both girls play indoor soccer on Saturdays and my husband coaches. Today, there wasn't time to run in between their games, so I ran after the second game, as soon as my husband got home. I also baked bread in between. I'd like to add "sit with a book and read" to my plans for Saturdays, too.
But on the exercise front, this is an excellent spot to place a run. I might end up not running on Friday evenings anymore. This week I ran instead on Friday morning, getting up early (my fifth early morning of the week! I think that's a record), and ran 8.5km. Or slogged, more like it. It's harder going in the slush and the cold.
Today was a good day for a run. The paths were clear and not icy. The temp above zero. But it got very grey just as I prepared to head out and the temp dropped and sure enough it snowed during my run. Icy pellets that were blown by the wind into my face, and kind of hurt.
I went 15.5km in a time of one hour, 22 minutes (which includes time spent waiting at very slow stoplights--stupid traffic!). I can't figure out how to run a long slow run. Frankly, I just want to push the pace no matter what distance I'm going. I want to go as fast and hard as I can comfortably manage. Not sure why. Must be the brain I was born with.
Plan for tomorrow: possibly a morning yoga class. Possibly a run during my daughter's soccer practice. Both would be nice. I'd like to squeeze both in. We shall see.
Another running goal I have for this year is to run a minimum of 40km per week. I'd like to aim to run between 40-50, and if I'm training for a marathon that should be closer to 60+. But 40 is a manageable number to aim for on a regular basis. I think. So far this week I've run 32km, so I'd just need to run 8km tomorrow afternoon. Very doable.
Next week's long run with be a little bit longer, but not too much longer. I'd like to add no more than 2km per week as I bump up the distance to about 25km in preparation for the 30km race at the end of March. I don't think I'll run any longer than that for my long runs in preparation. And we'll see how it goes. I'd also like to sign up for the same half-marathon I ran last spring in early April, provided I'm nott be too worn out after the 30km race. I won't have to train any differently in order to add that race in.
But on the exercise front, this is an excellent spot to place a run. I might end up not running on Friday evenings anymore. This week I ran instead on Friday morning, getting up early (my fifth early morning of the week! I think that's a record), and ran 8.5km. Or slogged, more like it. It's harder going in the slush and the cold.
Today was a good day for a run. The paths were clear and not icy. The temp above zero. But it got very grey just as I prepared to head out and the temp dropped and sure enough it snowed during my run. Icy pellets that were blown by the wind into my face, and kind of hurt.
I went 15.5km in a time of one hour, 22 minutes (which includes time spent waiting at very slow stoplights--stupid traffic!). I can't figure out how to run a long slow run. Frankly, I just want to push the pace no matter what distance I'm going. I want to go as fast and hard as I can comfortably manage. Not sure why. Must be the brain I was born with.
Plan for tomorrow: possibly a morning yoga class. Possibly a run during my daughter's soccer practice. Both would be nice. I'd like to squeeze both in. We shall see.
Another running goal I have for this year is to run a minimum of 40km per week. I'd like to aim to run between 40-50, and if I'm training for a marathon that should be closer to 60+. But 40 is a manageable number to aim for on a regular basis. I think. So far this week I've run 32km, so I'd just need to run 8km tomorrow afternoon. Very doable.
Next week's long run with be a little bit longer, but not too much longer. I'd like to add no more than 2km per week as I bump up the distance to about 25km in preparation for the 30km race at the end of March. I don't think I'll run any longer than that for my long runs in preparation. And we'll see how it goes. I'd also like to sign up for the same half-marathon I ran last spring in early April, provided I'm nott be too worn out after the 30km race. I won't have to train any differently in order to add that race in.
Thursday, January 5, 2012
A new year
Hello and happy new year!
It's been a good start so far, with a strong and steady week. I still need to figure out where and when to fit in more running, especially the long run that I'll need to do weekly to prepare for the longer races. But this week has gone smoothly.
I swam on Monday, 2500m, though the last 500 were a total slog. I was going so slowly by that point! It took me 55 minutes to swim 2500m.
Tuesday was spin class. I felt like it was easier to get into the zone than it had been that last class before Christmas holidays. I was so zoned that I pushed extremely hard and thought I might throw up after those last few sprints. Thankfully for everyone, I did not. Not to self: don't eat for breakfast pre-workout.
Wednesday, yesterday, I ran, as usual. A little shorter because we used our winter route in the 'hood. About 8km. Slower with all the snow and cold. And then my husband and I went to a yoga class together. It was more of a long stretch class than a hard workout. Perfect. Except my lower back is still bothering me.
This morning I got up early and went swimming. My husband had planned to come along (our kids were having an overnight at their grandma's), but he wasn't keen when the alarm rang. He's not used to getting up so early. And he also sounded less interested when he heard how long I planned to swim. He's been swimming with the older kids some mornings, but they only go for about 20-30 minutes. So I went swimming on my own and he went to yoga instead. And I swam 3000m!!!! In 62 minutes!!! Only slightly over my goal time or 60 minutes flat. The coolest thing was that I actually got faster. My last 500m were my fastest. I felt so smooth in the water at that point, like I was one with the water. It's good to remember that only a few days ago I did not feel so strong. So there are good days and days that are more challenging, no matter how fit you are.
I came home pumped. But pretty tired.
Hoping for a yoga class tomorrow. Or a run. Or both. We shall see.
It's been a good start so far, with a strong and steady week. I still need to figure out where and when to fit in more running, especially the long run that I'll need to do weekly to prepare for the longer races. But this week has gone smoothly.
I swam on Monday, 2500m, though the last 500 were a total slog. I was going so slowly by that point! It took me 55 minutes to swim 2500m.
Tuesday was spin class. I felt like it was easier to get into the zone than it had been that last class before Christmas holidays. I was so zoned that I pushed extremely hard and thought I might throw up after those last few sprints. Thankfully for everyone, I did not. Not to self: don't eat for breakfast pre-workout.
Wednesday, yesterday, I ran, as usual. A little shorter because we used our winter route in the 'hood. About 8km. Slower with all the snow and cold. And then my husband and I went to a yoga class together. It was more of a long stretch class than a hard workout. Perfect. Except my lower back is still bothering me.
This morning I got up early and went swimming. My husband had planned to come along (our kids were having an overnight at their grandma's), but he wasn't keen when the alarm rang. He's not used to getting up so early. And he also sounded less interested when he heard how long I planned to swim. He's been swimming with the older kids some mornings, but they only go for about 20-30 minutes. So I went swimming on my own and he went to yoga instead. And I swam 3000m!!!! In 62 minutes!!! Only slightly over my goal time or 60 minutes flat. The coolest thing was that I actually got faster. My last 500m were my fastest. I felt so smooth in the water at that point, like I was one with the water. It's good to remember that only a few days ago I did not feel so strong. So there are good days and days that are more challenging, no matter how fit you are.
I came home pumped. But pretty tired.
Hoping for a yoga class tomorrow. Or a run. Or both. We shall see.
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